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Children nowadays spend a great deal of time watching television. However, television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which is why children are less well‐educated today. To what extent do you agree with this statement? v.16

Children nowadays spend a great deal of time watching television. However, television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which is why children are less well‐educated today. v. 16
One of the most controversial issues today relates to kids these days having much of time to interest in watching television. In this essay, I am going to examine this question from both points of view. On one side of the argument, there are people who argue that the benefits of transfer external world culture, such as, if they are living in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, they will learn the other country culture. Considerably outweigh its disadvantages. The main reason for believing this is that if the mothers having work, her children will busy about her, so she is finishing her work. It is also possible to say that arranging kids' time, as proof, every day, they will sleep at a suitable time. One good illustration of this is performed survey in 2002, kids have watched television, had possessed creative thinking. On the other hand, it is also possible to make the opposing case. It is often argued that in fact that, deliver culture that is not appropriate with the identical societal culture. For instance, Saudi culture is dissimilarity from Egyptian culture. People often have this opinion because children inhibit leaving home to go to school. In addition, sleeping hours become not enough. A second point is that objection doing assignments. Furthermore, they have not connection with society. A particularly good example here is statistics in 2009, say that the children are registered in sport gym, they are 25 percentage. To sum up, as we have seen, there are no easy answers to this question. On balance, however, I tend to believe that I tend to believe that, it is not ordinary to depend on watching television as teaching or education vehicle.
One of the most controversial issues
today
relates to kids these days having much of time to interest in watching television. In this essay, I am going to examine this question from both points of view.

On one side of the argument, there are
people
who argue that the benefits of transfer external world
culture
, such as, if they are living in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, they will learn the other country culture.

Considerably
outweigh its disadvantages. The main reason for believing this is that if the mothers having work, her children will busy about her,
so
she is finishing her work. It is
also
possible to say that arranging kids' time, as proof, every day, they will sleep at a suitable time.

One
good
illustration of this
is performed
survey in 2002, kids have
watched
television, had possessed creative thinking.

On the other hand
, it is
also
possible to
make
the opposing case. It is
often
argued that in fact that, deliver
culture
that is
not appropriate with the identical societal
culture
.
For instance
, Saudi
culture
is dissimilarity from Egyptian
culture
.
People
often
have this opinion
because
children inhibit leaving home to go to school.
In addition
, sleeping hours become not
enough
.

A second point is that objection doing assignments.
Furthermore
, they have not connection with society. A
particularly
good
example here is statistics in 2009, say that the children
are registered
in sport gym, they are 25 percentage.

To sum up, as we have
seen
, there are no easy answers to this question. On balance,
however
, I tend to believe that I tend to believe that, it is not ordinary to depend on watching television as teaching or education vehicle.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Children nowadays spend a great deal of time watching television. However, television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which is why children are less well‐educated today. v. 16

Essay
  American English
7 paragraphs
283 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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