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Children nowadays spend a great deal of time watching television. However, television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which is why children are less well‐educated today. To what extent do you agree with this statement? v.10

Children nowadays spend a great deal of time watching television. However, television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which is why children are less well‐educated today. v. 10
Watching television is becoming increasingly popular among young people at the moment. The common notion is that kids are not as intelligent as a result of using considerably less effective item for educational purposes compared to traditional books. This essay will support this concept, believing that books are superior in terms of conveying necessary information to children. Firstly, television contains a lot of excessive and frequently dangerous for young minds information. It should be claimed that children can get access to data, not allotted to them and therefore raise wrong personality inside themselves. Moreover, some banned websites can spoil them, bringing in certain repercussions. According to recent British research, teenagers, involved in watching adult film industry are prone to become more violent humans in their future. Al in all, it can distract students from their academic goals. Secondly, watching educational programs, children can easily lose their concentration and become tempted by other entertaining shows. All mankind, including presenters of new generation tend to opt for fun and favour rather than intellectual activities, if welcomed. Consequently, quality of learning gets down due to various interruptions into the educational process. Books, by contrast, provide learners with very precise and beneficial data, not to mention that interesting ones inspire them to soak new knowledge in large scales. To conclude, conventional method of studying, consisting mainly from educating via books should be considered as a far more sufficient one as television may deliver a huge amount of harmful information, together with inclination of children for watching recreational events being translated on TV instead of study in a proper way.
Watching television is becoming
increasingly
popular among young
people
at the moment. The common notion is that kids are not as intelligent
as a result
of using
considerably
less effective item for educational purposes compared to traditional
books
. This essay will support this concept, believing that
books
are superior in terms of conveying necessary information to children.

Firstly
, television contains
a lot of
excessive and
frequently
dangerous
for young minds information. It should
be claimed
that children can
get
access to data, not allotted to them and
therefore
raise
wrong
personality inside themselves.
Moreover
,
some
banned websites can spoil them, bringing in certain repercussions. According to recent British research,
teenagers
, involved in watching adult film industry are prone to become more violent humans in their future. Al in all, it can distract students from their academic goals.

Secondly
, watching educational programs, children can
easily
lose their concentration and become tempted by other entertaining
shows
. All mankind, including presenters of new generation tend to opt for fun and
favour
rather
than intellectual activities, if welcomed.
Consequently
, quality of learning
gets
down due to various interruptions into the educational process.
Books
, by contrast, provide learners with
very
precise and beneficial data, not to mention that interesting ones inspire them to soak new knowledge in large scales.

To conclude
, conventional method of studying, consisting
mainly
from educating via
books
should
be considered
as a far more sufficient one as television may deliver a huge amount of harmful information, together with inclination of children for watching recreational
events
being translated
on TV
instead
of study
in a proper way
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Language is the blood of the soul into which thoughts run and out of which they grow.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

IELTS essay Children nowadays spend a great deal of time watching television. However, television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which is why children are less well‐educated today. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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