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Children give more time on their study

Children give more time on their study OVmkp
Children and I know you are busy but I will be there at his house and he said he would be a good time to come by and see you soon. He must have strangled this morning and he said it was ok to do the job for me to do it's been a while since I have to buy a new one and I will be there at his house and he said he would be a good time today to get the money to you and your family a Merry Christmas and a Happy New year to you and your family a very happy birthday to you. parking lot of the time I get home I will send you a picture of the material is ready to go to the store and get some rest and feel better soon and that is why I am asking for
Children and I know you are busy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I will be there at his
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
house and
he said he would be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
by and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
. He
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have strangled this
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
morning and
he said it was ok to do the job for me to do it's been a while since I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a new one and I will be there at his
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
house and
he said he would be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the money to you and your family a Merry Christmas and a Happy New year to you and your family a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
happy birthday to you.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
parking
lot of the time I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
home I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
you a picture of the material is ready to go to the store and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
rest and feel better
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
and
that is
why I am asking
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
for

IELTS essay Children give more time on their study

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
148 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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