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change of percentage in ownership of some electrical appliances

change of percentage in ownership of some electrical appliances 2R0rx
Needless to say, some people work hard while others prefer not to push themselves beyond a certain limit. This essay is dedicated to analyse the major reasons behind this phenomenon and in my view, it has several consequences. Out of all the reason, the cogent one is the cut throat competition. In other words, as far as employers are concerned, to achieve holistic development in every arena, employees work in tough circumstances. In order to live comfortable lifestyle, they give up their whole potential in their work field to fulfill their quest. Moreover, students in the phase of learning often get pressurise by their parents since there are limited seats in their dream institutions which encourage them to work harder to make their parents as well as their ambitions satisfied. To illustrate, the cut off's in entrance examinations has increased whereas reserved seats are limited which leads to huge competition. What is more, in my perspective, working hard has detrimental impacts on students in particular and workers at large. Firstly, employees face stressful conditions due to overthinking about their future in their career. This not only results in personal and professional life imbalance but also lead to low productivity. Secondly, work load on students adversely affect their mental health and cause psychosomatic issues. Apart from this, their involvement in other cognitive skills get hindered in long term. Therefore, if the smart work would be given the equal place as hard work, the better it is. To conclude, some people are more hardworking then others due to several reasons and I believe it is not practical in long term.
Needless to say,
some
people
work
hard
while others prefer not to push themselves beyond a certain limit. This essay
is dedicated
to
analyse
the major reasons behind this phenomenon and in my view, it has several consequences.

Out of all the reason, the cogent one is the
cut throat
competition. In
other
words, as far as employers
are concerned
, to achieve holistic development in every arena, employees
work
in tough circumstances. In order to
live
comfortable lifestyle, they give up their whole potential in their
work
field to fulfill their quest.
Moreover
, students in the phase of learning
often
get
pressurise
by their parents since there
are limited
seats in their dream institutions which encourage them to
work
harder to
make
their parents
as well
as their ambitions satisfied. To illustrate, the
cut
off's
in entrance examinations has increased whereas reserved seats
are limited
which leads to huge competition.

What is more
, in my perspective, working
hard
has detrimental impacts on students
in particular
and workers at large.
Firstly
, employees face stressful conditions due to overthinking about their future in their career. This not
only
results in personal and professional life imbalance
but
also
lead to low productivity.
Secondly
,
work
load on students
adversely
affect their mental health and cause psychosomatic issues. Apart from this, their involvement in
other
cognitive
skills
get
hindered in long term.
Therefore
, if the smart
work
would be
given
the equal place as
hard
work
, the better it is.

To conclude
,
some
people
are more hardworking
then
others due to several reasons and I believe it is not practical in long term.
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IELTS essay change of percentage in ownership of some electrical appliances

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
268 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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