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Can people change their future or the fate is not changeable?

Can people change their future or the fate is not changeable? BaqpV
These days, observing people in miserable conditions is not surprising. Numerous people and households live their troubles and poverty. Some suppose that their best bet is to quickly adapt to the situation; however, others are against it and think that recovery effort is the door to a better life. In this essay, I will look at both opinions and finally preserve my point of view. On the one hand, several reasons could lie behind this acceptance and adaptation. Most of these people are not able to abandon their safe zone. Hence, the demand for preventing disasters is significantly high in their minds), and this bitterly preventive aim is all they have. Besides, there is another contributing factor named superstitious religious thoughts. A massive number of people believe deeply in the myth that mentions their fate had written before their birth, consequently, the endeavor due to getting rid of that is nothing efficient. In contrast to the first attitude, some opine by heart that every awful situation will pass if they attempt hard. They support this view that all barriers have a way to be overcome. They have strong faith in their potency of problem-solving; in other words, being beyond life's difficulties is their slogan. It is not so typical of them to surrender; literally oppose it, they have the motivation of dealing with problems. To sum up, in my opinion, human beings must try and even fight with hurdles. Whatever your tragedy is, you always have to find a solution and make this world easily feasible for yourself to live. Life is not far too comfortable; nonetheless, you do not have the right to yield.
These days, observing
people
in miserable conditions is not surprising. Numerous
people
and households
live
their troubles and poverty.
Some
suppose that their best bet is to
quickly
adapt to the situation;
however
, others are against it and
think
that recovery effort is the door to a better life. In this essay, I will look at both opinions and
finally
preserve my point of view.

On the one hand, several reasons could lie behind this acceptance and adaptation. Most of these
people
are not able to abandon their safe zone.
Hence
, the demand for preventing disasters is
significantly
high in their minds
)
, and this
bitterly
preventive aim is all they have.
Besides
, there is another contributing factor named superstitious religious thoughts. A massive number of
people
believe
deeply
in the myth that mentions their fate had written
before
their birth,
consequently
, the endeavor due to getting rid of
that is
nothing efficient.

In contrast
to the
first
attitude,
some
opine by heart that every awful situation will pass if they attempt
hard
. They support this view that all barriers have a way to
be overcome
. They have strong faith in their potency of problem-solving;
in other words
, being beyond life's difficulties is their slogan. It is not
so
typical of them to surrender;
literally
oppose it, they have the motivation of dealing with problems.

To sum up, in my opinion, human beings
must
try and
even fight with hurdles. Whatever your tragedy is, you always
have to
find a solution and
make
this world
easily
feasible for yourself to
live
. Life is not far too comfortable; nonetheless, you do not have the right to yield.
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IELTS essay Can people change their future or the fate is not changeable?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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