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Can anyone in this world able to choose a future profession

Can anyone in this world able to choose a future profession 06LBq
In early childhood children tell their parents whom they would like to be when they grow up. In school students begin thinking of their future profession. There are lots of professions in the world, and all of them are interesting and exciting. So it's very hard to discover your vocation in life. The choice of profession depends on your abilities. If you are good at humanities you should choose something in this field. And if you are good at natural sciences you should choose something closely connected with them. I would like to become a chemist because I like chemistry. I think that it is a very interesting subject, but I am not so good at it so I think that I am not suitable for this profession. Inspite of all I possess some qualities which are needed in this field. I think that my future profession will be closely connected with computers. I am capable to work with them, and I also possess the qualities needed in this work. They are accuracy, energy, carefulness. But I hesitate if I have enough patience. I must develop it if I want to become a computer operator. I know that it would be better to choose a profession of an interpreter or any other occupation connected with Russian and literature because I am good at these subjects but when I began to study the computer skills that was what I have been looking for. In our modern world it's hard to do without computers. They are needed everywhere, and I hope that my interests in this subject will never change inspite of any circumstances.
In early childhood children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
their parents whom they would like to be when they grow up. In school students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
thinking of their future
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
profession
. There are lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professions
in the world, and all of them are interesting and exciting.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to discover your vocation in life.

The choice of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
profession
depends on your abilities.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
you are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
at humanities you should choose something in this field. And if you are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
at natural sciences you should choose something
closely
connected with them. I would like to become a chemist
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I like chemistry. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
interesting subject,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I am not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
at it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that I am not suitable for this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
profession
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Inspite
of all I possess
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
qualities which
are needed
in this field.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that my future
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
profession
will be
closely
connected with computers. I am capable to work with them, and I
also
possess the qualities needed in this work. They are accuracy, energy, carefulness.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
I hesitate if I have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
patience. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
develop it if I want to become a computer operator. I know that it would be better to choose a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
profession
of an interpreter or any other occupation connected with Russian and literature
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I am
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
at these subjects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
when I began to study the computer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
that was what I have been looking for. In our modern world it's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to do without computers. They
are needed
everywhere, and I hope that my interests in this subject will never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
Possible spelling mistake found.
inspite
of any circumstances.
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IELTS essay Can anyone in this world able to choose a future profession

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
272 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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