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Buying things on the Internet, such as books, air tickets and groceries, is becoming more and more popular.Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages?

Online shopping has attract many people's attention and it becomes trending in this modern era. In this essay, I will explain why it becomes popular among people's life these days. On the one hand, shopping via online can offer a few great benefits in our life. Firstly, it helps people shop much easier and more effective. Moreover, there are a lot of apps that can be installed to support online shopping such as Shopee, Tokopedia, and many more. To illustrate, Shopee provides some feature to help us buy any kinds of tickets, books, and house needs in which we can order it whenever and wherever we are. The technology improvement has assisst many people that hardly have time to go shopping. Secondly, it offers many vouchers that might lowering the prices of some products. It commonly gives free delivery cost to customers that lives in certain areas. Thus, this benefits often attract the majority of people in societies to shop via online. On the other hand, buying things on the internet can also pose some main challenges. To begin with, some people often get robbed by purchasing things online. Although these online stores look trusted because of its marketing strategy, they often fake some testimonies to get people's trust. Once the customers have trusted them, they blocked the customers so the customers will not be able to contact them. Furthermore, online shopping makes people cannot stop shopping since it often advertises many vouchers that changes people perspective to not missed this offer. In conclusion, while online shopping makes people buy their daily needs easier, it can also make people lose their money. Therefore, on balance, I remain firmly convinced that the merits are eclipsed by the demerits.
Online
shopping
has
attract
many
people
's
attention and
it becomes trending in this modern era. In this essay, I will
explain
why it becomes popular among
people
's life these days. On the one hand,
shopping
via
online
can offer a few great benefits in our life.
Firstly
, it
helps
people
shop much easier and more effective.
Moreover
, there are
a lot of
apps that can
be installed
to support
online
shopping
such as Shopee, Tokopedia, and
many
more. To illustrate, Shopee provides
some
feature to
help
us
buy
any kinds of tickets, books, and
house
needs in which we can order it whenever and wherever we are. The technology improvement has
assisst
many
people
that hardly have time to go
shopping
.
Secondly
, it offers
many
vouchers that might
lowering
the prices of
some
products. It
commonly
gives free delivery cost to
customers
that
lives
in certain areas.
Thus
, this benefits
often
attract the majority of
people
in societies to shop via online.

On the other hand
, buying things on the internet can
also
pose
some
main challenges. To
begin
with,
some
people
often
get
robbed by purchasing things
online
. Although these
online
stores look trusted
because
of its marketing strategy, they
often
fake
some
testimonies to
get
people
's trust. Once the
customers
have trusted them, they blocked the
customers
so
the
customers
will not be able to contact them.
Furthermore
,
online
shopping
makes
people
cannot
stop
shopping
since it
often
advertises
many
vouchers that
changes
people
perspective to not missed this offer.

In conclusion
, while
online
shopping
makes
people
buy
their daily needs easier, it can
also
make
people
lose their money.
Therefore
, on balance, I remain
firmly
convinced that the merits
are eclipsed
by the demerits.
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IELTS essay Buying things on the Internet, such as books, air tickets and groceries, is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
287 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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