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Businesses should hire employees for their entire lives. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons andexamples to support your answer v.2

Businesses should hire employees for their entire lives. Use specific reasons andexamples to support your answer v. 2
The purposes of watching films have been a topic of concern in modern society. While some people consider movies a source of entertainment with no other additional values, others believe in the educational benefits of them. As far as this is concerned, one cannot neglect the education tonal aspect of these productions. Films, regardless of genre, are a means of entertainment for people. Seeing a movie means people can temporarily escape from their daily life, which may help them relieve their stress and be mentally healthier. There are, in addition to this, some specific genres of movies such as comedy, which can make people laugh and become elated. In brief, films are true of great entertainment benefit. It would be, however, an exaggeration to state that the sole purpose of movies is to entertain because other aspects of them such as the educational one are not negligible. Viewers have been using films to learn foreign languages, in a sense that listening to people conversing in a film is a great way to hear native actors and actresses speaking their language. Some others have, furthermore, watched films to learn about the culture and ways of life of other places on Earth. An excellent example of this is the documentary "love market in Sapa", from which people may learn about Sapa, a famous tourist attraction in the north of Vietnam. In conclusion, movies can truly entertain people and simultaneously provide them with great educational benefits, such as learning a new language or culture. It is predicted that more people will consider films as essential learning materials in the future
The purposes of watching films have been a topic of concern in modern society. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
a source of entertainment with no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
additional values, others believe in the educational benefits of them. As far as this
is concerned
, one cannot neglect the education tonal aspect of these productions.

Films, regardless of genre, are a means of entertainment for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Seeing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
means
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
temporarily
escape from their daily life, which may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them relieve their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and be mentally healthier. There are,
in addition
to this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
specific genres of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
such as comedy, which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
laugh and become elated.
In brief
, films are true of great entertainment benefit.

It would be,
however
, an exaggeration to state that the sole purpose of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
is to entertain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
aspects of them such as the educational one are not negligible. Viewers have been using films to learn foreign languages, in a sense that listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
conversing in a film is a great way to hear native actors and actresses speaking their language.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
others have,
furthermore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
films to learn about the culture and ways of life of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
places on Earth. An excellent example of this is the documentary
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
market in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sapa
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
, from which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may learn about
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sapa
, a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
tourist attraction in the north of Vietnam.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
can
truly
entertain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
simultaneously
provide them with great educational benefits, such as learning a new language or culture. It
is predicted
that more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will consider films as essential learning materials in the
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
future
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Businesses should hire employees for their entire lives. Use specific reasons andexamples to support your answer v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
266 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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