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business, culture are contact to develop country

business, culture are contact to develop country 3Yxol
Globalization is a pace of development which all countries are leading to, due to the fact that, it is believed commerce national quintessence interacting will be beneficial, while many people concern that this trend may impulse their own culture to the edge of extinction. On the one hand, during transaction, the tradition lifestyle and languages may be diminished. While assimilating to the other culture, people tend to forget about their own convention. For instance, there are more than 7 thousands languages however a vast number of them are approximately vanished, and civilization is the same. On the other hand, none can deny that international transaction is an opportunity for not only speed up the local economy but also a way to glean more knowledge. Back to date, when the open-door policy was applied, several cutting edge invention that day broaden mind and assisted many backward countries to strengthen their commerce. Moreover, since the appearance of internet, various photographs, videos of places will promote and motivate tourism, more and more company will invest and introduce to the customers, which also means the denizens in these situations can increase income by selling things for tourist. Additionally, reaching globalization, countries can export their commodity and bring more profits to improve local's life. In conclusion, growing economy is a necessary of all countries, whereas, protecting culture is a must. In my opinion, I contend that it is more advantageous than detrimental.
Globalization is a pace of development which all
countries
are leading to, due to the fact that, it
is believed
commerce national quintessence interacting will be beneficial, while
many
people
concern that this trend may impulse their
own
culture to the edge of extinction.

On the one hand, during transaction, the tradition lifestyle and languages may
be diminished
. While assimilating to the other culture,
people
tend to forget about their
own
convention.
For instance
, there are more than 7 thousands languages
however
a vast number of them are approximately vanished, and civilization is the same.

On the other hand
, none can deny that international transaction is an opportunity for not
only
speed up
the local economy
but
also
a way to glean more knowledge. Back to date, when the open-door policy
was applied
, several cutting edge invention that day broaden mind and assisted
many
backward
countries
to strengthen their commerce.
Moreover
, since the appearance of internet, various photographs, videos of places will promote and motivate tourism, more and more
company
will invest and introduce to the customers, which
also
means the denizens in these situations can increase income by selling things for tourist.
Additionally
, reaching globalization,
countries
can export their commodity and bring more profits to
improve
local's life.

In conclusion
, growing economy is a necessary of all
countries
, whereas, protecting culture is a
must
. In my opinion, I contend that it is more advantageous than detrimental.
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IELTS essay business, culture are contact to develop country

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
237 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
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Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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