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Business and cultural contact

Business and cultural contact bOOx6
In our modern era some people consider promoting business and cultural interaction among different nations is the premise of positive relations between them. On the contrary, some think that it leads to a disappearance of the national values. To begin with, having no opportunity to exchange cultural and business activities among countries causes isolation which finally leads to the demolition of a nation. We live in a world, where international and unilateral approcahes become more fertile. Every nation should acquire sharing and spreading domestic products as well as cultural values in order to gain international appreciation and awareness. For example, North Korea, the country, which has no ties with international community and global politics. As a result, researches show that North Korea's economic condition is worthening every year. Cultural contact is also crucial for every nation - in order to learn something new exchanging interests and knowledge is essential.  Increasing business and cultural contact between nations has many positive effects and the fact makes internetional politics and economy easier, it helps the presence of international competition, which is the precondition of country's improvement. Nevertheless, there are still some negative factors in this process of national interaction, which sometimes leads to the disappearance of the national identity. Some countries try to appropriate others merits. Increasing interaction may cause losing faith in domestic opportunities and complete dependence on other's products or values. This finally leads to disappearing specific nation or conquering it by stronger countries. In conclusion, I prefer to live in a world, where business and cultural contact is compulsory as it leads to diversity of activities and opportunities, but it still may be the reason of national extinguishment in some cases, especially when the contact is not implemented correctly.
In our modern era
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
consider promoting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
interaction among
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
is the premise of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
relations between them.
On the contrary
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it leads to a disappearance of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
values.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, having no opportunity to exchange
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
activities among countries causes isolation which
finally
leads to the demolition of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
. We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a world, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
and unilateral
Possible spelling mistake found.
approcahes
become more fertile. Every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
should acquire sharing and spreading domestic products
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
values in order to gain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
appreciation and awareness.
For example
, North Korea, the country, which has no ties with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
community and global politics.
As a result
, researches
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that North Korea's economic condition is
Possible spelling mistake found.
worthening
every year.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contact
is
also
crucial for every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
in order to learn something new exchanging interests and knowledge is essential.  Increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contact
between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects and the fact
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
Possible spelling mistake found.
internetional
politics and economy easier, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
the presence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
competition, which is the precondition of country's improvement.

Nevertheless
, there are
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
factors in this process of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
interaction, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
leads to the disappearance of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
identity.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
countries try to appropriate others merits. Increasing interaction may cause losing faith in domestic opportunities and complete dependence on other's products or values. This
finally
leads to disappearing specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
or conquering it by stronger countries.

In conclusion
, I prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a world, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contact
is compulsory as it leads to diversity of activities and opportunities,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
still
may be the reason of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
Possible spelling mistake found.
extinguishment
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases,
especially
when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contact
is not implemented
correctly
.
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IELTS essay Business and cultural contact

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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