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BIG SALARY IS MUCH MORE IMPORTANT THAN JOB SATISFACTION. DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE?

BIG SALARY IS MUCH MORE IMPORTANT THAN JOB SATISFACTION. GMJyg
It is argued that it is more opportune to choose a job with high salary, even if does not attract you at all. I totally disagree with this opinion and consider that job satisfaction is much more important than salary. First and foremost, I believe that work satisfaction is gives to workforces sense of fulfillment. In other words, whose love their job, they will be reach a career progression, and thus their work/life balance is would be equally with one-another. For instance, according to the my country statistics, many people altered their well-paid job, in order to find the sense of joy about their job, hereby they live more happily, compare their previous job. In addition, the job satisfaction also improves the quality of productivity in their field. And in this case, they would not become overthinking for their amount of salary. Under no circumstances, could they persuading the job, which is uninteresting and tedious for them. To illustrate, some well-known artists have changed their minds and turned to the arts, despite initially studying law or medicine. That is why it is more important to select the kind of work that makes you happy than to look only at a high salary. To summarize, I strongly believe job satisfaction is more favourable than big salary. We can thrive our objective on our career.
It
is argued
that it is more opportune to choose a
job
with high salary, even if does not attract you at all. I
totally
disagree with this opinion and consider that
job
satisfaction
is much more
important
than salary.

First
and foremost, I believe that work
satisfaction
is gives to
workforces
sense of fulfillment.
In other words
, whose
love
their
job
, they will be reach a career progression, and
thus
their work/life balance is would be
equally
with one-another.
For instance
, according to
the my country
statistics,
many
people
altered their well-paid
job
, in order to find the sense of joy about their
job
, hereby they
live
more
happily
, compare their previous job.

In addition
, the
job
satisfaction
also
improves
the quality of productivity in their field. And
in this case
, they would not become overthinking for their amount of salary. Under no circumstances, could
they persuading
the
job
, which is uninteresting and tedious for them. To illustrate,
some
well-known artists have
changed
their minds and turned to the arts, despite
initially
studying law or medicine.
That is
why it is more
important
to select the kind of work that
makes
you happy than to look
only
at a high salary.

To summarize
, I
strongly
believe
job
satisfaction
is more
favourable
than
big
salary. We can thrive our objective on our career.
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IELTS essay BIG SALARY IS MUCH MORE IMPORTANT THAN JOB SATISFACTION.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
223 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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