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Being a celebrity - such as a famous film star or sports personality - brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge. v.23

Fame undoubtedly changes a person’s life. Nevertheless, such changes are not always for the better; in fact, for all professions, from movie star to sports personalities, being a celebrity has challenges as well as benefits. Undoubtedly, fame can be extremely rewarding. Firstly, there is the sense of personal fulfillment that must come from making your family proud of what you have achieved. Secondly, celebrities can reap enormous financial rewards from their fame. On top of their fees, the famous have the potential to earn huge amount of money from promoting luxury brands. A type of wealth that is possible because celebrities are often seen as role models, and so people want to copy them and buy what they have. Being a focus for the world’s attention is clearly lucrative. However, achieving this status is not without its problems. First, celebrities can no longer live a normal life. If they visit public places, such as malls and bars, people will crowd around them demanding a picture or autograph. To avoid this, the famous are forced to live in gated communities, visit the most expensive restaurants and hotels, and hire personal body guards for themselves and their families. Second, being a public figure means that your life is like an open book. The public love to gossip about the lives of celebrities, so it is almost impossible for them to have any privacy. As a result, the famous can be made to feel isolated and under siege. To sum up, whilst being famous brings huge financial benefits, there are even more significant drawbacks. In my view, only those who manage to handle the problems associated with fame, can truly be said to reap its rewards.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Fame
undoubtedly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
a person’s life.
Nevertheless
, such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
are not always for the better; in fact, for all professions, from movie star to sports personalities, being a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
has challenges
as well
as benefits.

Undoubtedly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fame
can be
extremely
rewarding.
Firstly
, there is the sense of personal fulfillment that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from making your family proud of what you have achieved.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
can reap enormous financial rewards from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fame
. On top of their fees, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
have the potential to earn huge amount of money from promoting luxury brands. A type of wealth
that is
possible
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
as role models, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
want to copy them and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
what they have. Being a focus for the world’s attention is
clearly
lucrative.

However
, achieving this status is not without its problems.
First
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
can no longer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a normal life. If they visit public places, such as malls and bars,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will crowd around them demanding a picture or autograph. To avoid this, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
are forced
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in gated communities, visit the most expensive restaurants and hotels, and hire personal body guards for themselves and their families. Second, being a public figure means that your life is like an open book. The public
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to gossip about the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is almost impossible for them to have any privacy.
As a result
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
can
be made
to feel isolated and under siege.

To sum up, whilst being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
brings huge financial benefits, there are even more significant drawbacks. In my view,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
those who manage to handle the problems associated with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fame
, can
truly
be said
to reap its rewards.

IELTS essay Being a celebrity - such as a famous film star or sports personality - brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity has more benefits or more problems?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • Being a celebrity - such as a famous film star or sports personality - brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge. v.23