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becoming popular for anyone. It is proposed that shopping habits depend more on age group than anything else. W

becoming popular for anyone. It is proposed that shopping habits depend more on age group than anything else. W xa0y1
Nowadays, shopping has becoming popular for anyone. It is proposed that shopping habits depend more on age group than anything else. While this opinion is valid to a certain extent, I would argue there are many factors affect on shopping habits. It is understandable why some endorse to the view that the age bracket is the most influential factor in shopping wont. The reason is that people in every age group have different gout. Youngsters tend to choose trendy clothes like blazer, . . . They mix and match them to keep up with the latest fashion. Moreover, People belonging to the age group 20+ spend more time to go shopping and thinking "today what I should wear" than old people. On the other hand, casual clothes, comfortable skirts are usually chosen by people at the age of 45+. They pay attention to dress for the occasion more than follow the trend. However, this line of reasoning is flawed. This is because, not only age group can affect shopping habits but also social class. Therefore, age group seems not to be a factor which shopping habits depend on the most. Beside age bracket, it is up to social class. Rich people tend to purchase stuff which more expensive than anyone else. They have many things to choose without care about the cost like Chanel, Dior. . . or something like that. It can be 1000$ or more. Brand name or suitable clothes are paid attention at first. Nevertheless, people belonging other social class are different. When they choose something, they usually take notice about the price more than material, brand. . . Last but not least, the former usually spend more time to go shopping than the latter. The reason why is shopping are seen as an entertainment for the former. In a nutsell, while it is belived that shopping habits depend more on age group than anything else, I am of the opinion that social class have more influencial in this habit.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
has becoming popular for anyone. It
is proposed
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habits
depend more on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
than anything else. While this opinion is valid to a certain extent, I would argue there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
factors
Did you mean "effect"?
affect
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
habits.

It is understandable why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
endorse to the view that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
bracket is the most influential factor in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
Please make sure you mean 'wont' (a habit), not "won't"/"won’t" (short for 'will not')?
wont
. The reason is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
gout. Youngsters tend to choose trendy clothes like blazer
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
They mix and match them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
up with the latest fashion.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
belonging to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
20+ spend more time to go
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
and thinking
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
what I should wear
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
On the other hand
, casual clothes, comfortable skirts are
usually
chosen by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 45+. They pay attention to dress for the occasion more than follow the trend.
However
, this line of reasoning
is flawed
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
can affect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habits
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
seems not to be a factor which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habits
depend on the most.

Beside
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
bracket, it is up to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. Rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
stuff which more expensive than anyone else. They have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things to choose without care about the cost like Chanel, Dior.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
or
something like that. It can be
The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: "$1000".
1000$
or more. Brand name or suitable clothes
are paid
attention at
first
.
Nevertheless
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
belonging other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
. When they choose something, they
usually
take notice about the price more than material, brand.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, the former
usually
spend more time to go
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
than the latter. The reason why is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
as an entertainment for the former.

In a
Possible spelling mistake found.
nutsell
, while it is
Possible spelling mistake found.
belived
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habits
depend more on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
than anything else, I am of the opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
have more
Possible spelling mistake found.
influencial
in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habit
.
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IELTS essay becoming popular for anyone. It is proposed that shopping habits depend more on age group than anything else. W

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
333 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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