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As the world become technologically advanced, computer are replacing more and more jobs. Describe some job position that may be lost because of computers, and discuss at least one problem that may result.

As the world become technologically advanced, computer are replacing more and more jobs. Describe some job position that may be lost because of computers, and discuss at least one problem that may result. 2dyb
Electronic gadgets are essential for doing any work in a couple of minutes. As the globe become with high level technology and computer are relocating as a jobs. This essay will provide some jobs which is lost owning to computers and also merely conflict in upcoming paragraph. In this present scenario, there is a plethora of jobs which is eradicated due to computers. Firstly, teacher jobs has been lost because. Nowadays, computer are become smarter and faster and those student who can study from computer then why fupil parents pay the fees of Tutor. Secondly, share market broker or agent. To explicate, these days, there is a multiple of applications of share market in mobile phone and computers in which a buyer can easily purchase any share without any adversely with the assist of Technology in shorter period of time. Lastly, newspaper reporters has become jobless due to modern application. In other words, not only application provide news in mobile phone but also it give in lots of different types of languages in what a person is comfortable so folks will never waste their financial income by buying physical newspaper. For instance, in New Zealand, because of computers and latest technologies 50% of citizen job has been lost. There is a one prominent hurdle in computers while working as a jobs and that is technical errors in other words electronic gadgets is not and living thing so whenever and whatever will occur in different situation like hacking, window corrupt, and hang, in that period a person cannot do anything and there work has been strucked. For example, in Australia, in 2008, one company had determined that all the workload to give to the computer to observe that what will happen but as a result, that establish suffer from tremendous mislaying. In conclusion, although computers play a crucial role in all the human life, a computer will never ever take human place because the machine is a machine.
Electronic gadgets are essential for doing any work in a couple of minutes. As the globe become with high level technology and computer are relocating as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
. This essay will provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
which
is lost
owning to computers and
also
merely
conflict in upcoming paragraph.

In this present scenario, there is a plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
which
is eradicated
due to computers.
Firstly
, teacher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
has
been lost
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
. Nowadays, computer
are become
smarter and faster and
Did you mean "this student" or "those students"?
those student
who can study from computer then why
Possible spelling mistake found.
fupil
parents pay the fees of Tutor.
Secondly
, share market broker or agent. To explicate, these days, there is a multiple of applications of share market in mobile phone and computers in which a buyer can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
any share without any
adversely
with the assist of Technology in shorter period of time.
Lastly
, newspaper reporters has become jobless due to modern application.
In other words
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
application provide news in mobile phone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
it
Did you mean "gives"?
give
in lots of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of languages in what a person is comfortable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
folks will never waste their financial income by buying physical newspaper.
For instance
, in New Zealand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of computers and latest technologies 50% of citizen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
has
been lost
.

There is a one prominent hurdle in computers while working as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
and
that is
technical errors
in other words
electronic gadgets is not and living thing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
whenever and whatever will occur in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
situation like hacking, window corrupt, and hang, in that period a person cannot do anything and there work has been
Possible spelling mistake found.
strucked
.
For example
, in Australia, in 2008, one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
had determined that all the workload to give to the computer to observe that what will happen
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
as a result
, that establish suffer from tremendous mislaying.

In conclusion
, although computers play a crucial role in all the human life, a computer will never ever take human place
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the machine is a machine.

IELTS essay As the world become technologically advanced, computer are replacing more and more jobs. Describe some job position that may be lost because of computers, and discuss at least one problem that may result.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
327 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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