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As technology develops, more shopping and business is done through the internet while communication face to face becomes less frequent. Is this a positive or a negative development?

As technology develops, more shopping and business is done through the internet while communication face to face becomes less frequent. Is this a positive or a negative development? g5AmD
Nowadays, some people choose to go shopping and do business online, which has led to less face-to-face communication in their life. Some have taken this trend as an unfavourable development, while others disagree. This essay will explore both its positive and negative effects. Some hold that online shopping and business, promoted by technology, have brought much convenience and simplicity. First, with computers and mobile phones wildly used today, we can easily find what we need on the Internet. But if we go to shops for clothes, we would probably meet many troubles, such as wasting time travelling on the road, trying on quite a few pieces of clothes, and possibly queuing up in a long line of consumers. In addition3 online business, such as video conference3 can save businesspersons' time. Then, those working in international companies do not need to travel for meetings. However, fewer opportunities to see others, resulted in by the increasing use of the Internet, might bring a consequence where individuals cannot effectively communicate with others in their life. If they rely on the Internet for almost everything, either shopping or business, perhaps they will sit all day before the computer without having to talk at all. Once before another person in their life, it is likely that they would not know how to express themselves and respond to others. In my opinion, the advantages of online shopping and business outweigh their disadvantages. For it is the netizens, instead of the Internet itself, that has brought inconvenience to their own life. To eliminate the negative effects of the Internet, they have to raise their ability of self-control.
Nowadays,
some
people
choose to go
shopping
and do
business
online
, which has led to less face-to-face communication in their
life
.
Some
have taken this trend as an
unfavourable
development, while others disagree. This essay will explore both its
positive
and
negative
effects.

Some
hold that
online
shopping
and
business
, promoted by technology, have brought much convenience and simplicity.
First
, with computers and mobile phones
wildly
used
today
, we can
easily
find what we need on the Internet.
But
if we go to shops for clothes, we would
probably
meet
many
troubles, such as wasting time travelling on the road, trying on quite a few pieces of clothes, and
possibly
queuing up in a long line of consumers. In addition3
online
business
, such as video conference3 can save businesspersons' time. Then, those working in international
companies
do not need to travel for meetings.

However
, fewer opportunities to
see
others, resulted in by the increasing
use
of the Internet, might bring a consequence where individuals cannot
effectively
communicate with others in their
life
. If they rely on the Internet for almost everything, either
shopping
or
business
, perhaps they will sit all day
before
the computer without having to talk at all. Once
before
another person in their
life
, it is likely that they would not know how to express themselves and respond to others.

In my opinion, the advantages of
online
shopping
and
business
outweigh their disadvantages. For it is the netizens,
instead
of the Internet itself, that has brought inconvenience to their
own
life
. To eliminate the
negative
effects of the Internet, they
have to
raise their ability of self-control.
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IELTS essay As technology develops, more shopping and business is done through the internet while communication face to face becomes less frequent. Is this a positive or a negative development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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