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As more and more people compete for jobs today, it is becoming evident that holding a university degree is not enough to guarantee a good job. For this reason, a growing number of students are looking for work experience either before they go to university or during their university studies. In your opinion, is it a good idea to gain work experience before you graduate

As more and more people compete for jobs today, it is becoming evident that holding a university degree is not enough to guarantee a good job. For this reason, a growing number of students are looking for work experience either before they go to university or during their university studies. In your opinion, is it a good idea to gain work experience before you graduate j9xAN
To obtain a qualified profession is a dream of every fresh graduate and student. However, it is not easy to make this dream come true even if one holds a university degree. Because of this reason, young people are eager to have a work experience before they graduate. I believe that, having a work experience at their early ages and before graduation has a significant impact on students’ future careers in many ways and I will discuss some of them. To begin with, there are some benefits for one to have a work experience prior to their graduation from a university. The concept of leaving their comfort zone is one of them. For example, there are number of high school or university students who prefer to spend their summer holidays by participating in the programs of international organizations such as AISEC, WORK AND TRAVEL, WORK AND HOLIDAY etc. In this way, not only do they improve their self-confidence by going to a different country but also their social skills get enhanced by making acquaintance of different people. Moreover, as they keep socializing with people from different countries, their foreign language skills are improved as well. In this sense, it will be less unchallenging for them to maintain the communication with their colleagues when they start working at a company. Apart from that, once a student has a chance to start working at a place, there is a high possibility that this person can contribute to a work environment as effective as possible when they graduate in the future. In addition to this, having a job experience before graduating from a university can contribute to their leadership skills that can increase their chance to get good or their dream positions during official job application process. Another benefit of having a work experience at an early age is that they do not waste so much time with learning the details of the work when they are admitted to a department of a company. That is to say, they can easily cope with the orientation process based on their past experiences. To conclude, I personally believe that, having a work experience before graduation and at early ages combined with these aforementioned factors are the milestone of students’ career pathways.
To obtain a qualified profession is a dream of every fresh graduate and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
.
However
, it is not easy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
this dream
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
true even if one holds a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
degree.
Because of this
reason, young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are eager to have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
they graduate. I believe that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
at their early ages and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
graduation has a significant impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students’
future careers in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways and I will discuss
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits for one to have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
prior to their graduation from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
. The concept of leaving their comfort zone is one of them.
For example
, there are number of high school or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who prefer to spend their summer holidays by participating in the programs of international organizations such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
AISEC
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
WORK
AND TRAVEL,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
WORK
AND HOLIDAY etc. In this way, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
do they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their self-confidence by going to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
their social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
enhanced by making acquaintance of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
Moreover
, as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
socializing with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries, their foreign language
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
as well
. In this sense, it will be less
Possible spelling mistake found.
unchallenging
for them to maintain the communication with their colleagues when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
working at a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

Apart from that, once a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
has a chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
working at a place, there is a high
Bad style. Before 'possible', use a word such as "chance" or "opportunity". Alternatively, keep 'possibility' and remove 'possible'.
possibility
that this person can contribute to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
environment as effective as possible when they graduate in the future.
In addition
to this,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
graduating from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
can contribute to their leadership
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
that can increase their chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
or their dream positions during official job application process. Another benefit of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
at an early age is that they do not waste
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much time with learning the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
when they
are admitted
to a department of a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.
That is
to say, they can
easily
cope with the orientation process based on their
Consider using "experiences".
past experiences
.

To conclude
, I
personally
believe that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
graduation and at early ages combined with these aforementioned factors are the milestone of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students’
career pathways.
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IELTS essay As more and more people compete for jobs today, it is becoming evident that holding a university degree is not enough to guarantee a good job. For this reason, a growing number of students are looking for work experience either before they go to university or during their university studies. In your opinion, is it a good idea to gain work experience before you graduate

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
376 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • As more and more people compete for jobs today, it is becoming evident that holding a university degree is not enough to guarantee a good job. For this reason, a growing number of students are looking for work experience either before they go to university or during their university studies. In your opinion, is it a good idea to gain work experience before you graduate