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Art is considered an essential part of all cultures throughout the world. However, these days fewer and fewer people appreciate art and turn their focus to science, technology and business. Why do you think that is? What could be done to encourage more people to take interest in the arts?

Art is considered an essential part of all cultures throughout the world. However, these days fewer and fewer people appreciate art and turn their focus to science, technology and business. Why do you think that is? What could be done to encourage more people to take interest in the arts? G7ww
Art is an important part of culture heritage. Therefore, across the globe art from a vital element of cultures. However, nowadays, not numerous individual are interested in arts. Actually, Majority of people move towards the subjects like, Science, Technology, and business. The main reasons behind is that there is a numbers of opportunities for the earning. To commence with that, art is not interested as subject because it’s not considered to be practical. Furthermore, there is not excellent chance for the securing jobs in multinational companies. A numbers of artists struggle to earn their livelihood as compared to business and technological person. Science and technological subjects are gateways to success. To illustrate, a recent survey of conducted by The times of India has showed that, numerous science graduate get better jobs offer compared to art graduates. However, art is backbone of the culture in the globe. Lack of interest in art will make a culture like to body without breath. The authority can help to survive it. There should be open some art schools and colleges, Also there should be specific pay grade for the artists, consequently they can easily survive on that and also individual take interest that realm. The authority should have allocated a budget for the developing and constructions of art galleries. Organize cultural events consequently, artist represents their art and that will generate revenue. For the better financial purpose and career option there should keep some prospects. In conclude, subjects of science, technology and business are attractive in terms of job prospects, but art too can be a source of livelihood. The combined efforts of authorities and individual are indeed necessary for the survival of art.
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Art
is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
heritage.
Therefore
, across the globe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
from a vital element of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
.
However
, nowadays, not numerous individual
are interested
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
. Actually,
It seems that an article is missing.
Majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
towards the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
like,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
, Technology, and business. The main reasons behind is that
Did you mean "there are a numbers"?
there is a numbers
of opportunities for the earning.

To commence with that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
is not interested as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it’s not considered to be practical.
Furthermore
, there is not excellent chance for the securing jobs in multinational
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "A number" or simply "numbers"?
A numbers
of artists struggle to earn their livelihood as compared to business and technological person.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
and technological
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
are gateways to success. To illustrate, a recent survey of conducted by
If the term is a proper noun, use the suggested capitalization.
The times of India
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that, numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
graduate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better jobs offer compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
graduates.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
is backbone of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
in the globe. Lack of interest in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
like to body without breath. The authority can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to survive it. There should be open
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
schools and colleges,
Also
there should be specific pay grade for the artists,
consequently
they can
easily
survive on that and
also
individual take interest that realm. The authority should have allocated a budget for the developing and constructions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
galleries. Organize cultural
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
consequently
, artist represents their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and that will generate revenue. For the better financial purpose and career option there should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
prospects.

In conclude,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
, technology and business are attractive in terms of job prospects,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
too can be a source of livelihood. The combined efforts of authorities and individual are
indeed
necessary for the survival of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
.
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IELTS essay Art is considered an essential part of all cultures throughout the world. However, these days fewer and fewer people appreciate art and turn their focus to science, technology and business. Why do you think that is? What could be done to encourage more people to take interest in the arts?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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