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Armed robbery is rampant in the suburbs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Armed robbery is rampant in the suburbs. xma1a
Crime rate such as burglary and theft is becoming increasingly prevalent in the rural areas. In my opinion, I support that outskirts now suffer an increased rate in robbery owing to the unemployment rate in such regions. While universities keep churning out graduates year after year, the demand for labour is extremely low. Consequently, there are a lot of idle youths who do not have gained employment and this has led to a rise in theft, pick pocketing, kidnapping for ransom in the local areas. Furthermore, the government and influential individuals who are in the position to suppprt the youths by providing jobs, creation of empowerment programmes and also construction of manufacturing companies, now employ them as thugs for their selfish political gains. For example, a story that was recently released in the PUNCH newspaper highlighted how an armed robber confessed to being paid by a member of the House of Representatives in exchange for him to threaten any of his oppositions. Another reason why there is an upsurge in the level of atrocities committed in the local areas is due to the increase in the production of violent movies. There are so many films today that display gory details, as a result, people try to imitate these violence in their environment. Moreover, there are no law enforcement agencies to instill fear into people. Corruption is now the order of the day with the police force. Many of these police officers lack integrity and even encourage these unlawful acts. In conclusion, the rise in the level of crime in the district areas is due to unemployment as well as the rise in the production of violent movies.
Crime rate such as burglary and theft is becoming
increasingly
prevalent in the rural
areas
. In my opinion, I support that outskirts
now
suffer an increased rate in robbery owing to the unemployment rate in such regions.

While universities
keep
churning out graduates year after year, the demand for
labour
is
extremely
low.
Consequently
, there are
a lot of
idle youths who do not have gained employment and this has led to a rise in theft, pick pocketing, kidnapping for ransom in the local
areas
.
Furthermore
, the
government
and influential individuals who are in the position to
suppprt
the youths by providing jobs, creation of empowerment
programmes
and
also
construction of manufacturing
companies
,
now
employ them as thugs for their selfish political gains.
For example
, a story that was recently released in the PUNCH newspaper highlighted how an armed robber confessed to
being paid
by a member of the
House
of Representatives in exchange for him to threaten any of his oppositions.

Another reason why there is an upsurge in the level of atrocities committed in the local
areas
is due to the increase in the production of violent movies. There are
so
many
films
today
that display gory
details
,
as a result
,
people
try to imitate
these violence
in their environment.
Moreover
, there are no law enforcement agencies to instill fear into
people
. Corruption is
now
the order of the day with the police force.
Many
of these police officers lack integrity and even encourage these unlawful acts.

In conclusion
, the rise in the level of crime in the district
areas
is due to unemployment
as well
as the rise in the production of violent movies.
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IELTS essay Armed robbery is rampant in the suburbs.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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