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Are museums important? Tell me something about the museum that you visited last time

Are museums important? Tell me something about the museum that you visited last time 8G1aG
Definitely, museum not really places where I frequent. It depend on the theme of museums. If the theme is what I’m interested in, I would like to go there to have a look. To be frank, I’m not much of a museum goer, but I do think that they’re very useful. On the one hand, the museums are tourist attraction, which are kind of a must-go for tourist when people are in a foreign country. On the other hand, the main function of museums is to keep those historical and cultural items which people can help us broaden our knowledge, discover new cultural. If my memory serves me right, the last time I have been there about 2 years ago. I went to a war museum located in Hoi an ancient town. What I saw there was something amazing. There were numerous ancient paintings from the Vietnam war in the past. I think school children visit museums often, by visiting museums, they can learn a range of other fields that they would normally never know about. In conclusion, the museum is a good visiting environment.
Definitely,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
not
really
places where I frequent. It
Did you mean "depends"?
depend
on the theme of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
. If the theme is what I’m interested in, I would like to go there to have a look. To be frank, I’m not much of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
goer,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that they’re
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
useful. On the one hand, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
are tourist attraction, which are
If 'kind' is a classification term, 'a' is not necessary. Use "kind of". (The phrases 'kind of' and 'sort of' are informal if they mean 'to some extent'.)
kind of a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
-go for tourist when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are in a foreign country.
On the other hand
, the main function of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
those historical and cultural items which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us broaden our knowledge, discover new cultural. If my memory serves me right, the last time I have been there about 2 years ago. I went to a war
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
located in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hoi
an ancient town. What I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
there was something amazing. There were numerous ancient paintings from the
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
Vietnam war
in the past. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
school children visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
, by visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
, they can learn a range of other fields that they would
normally
never know about.
In conclusion
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
visiting environment.
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IELTS essay Are museums important? Tell me something about the museum that you visited last time

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
185 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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