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Are internal values still important?

Are internal values still important? obEjX
It's a common belief that in the contemporary world, people are judged with social status and economical possessions. Some people think that values such as honor, trust and kindness are no longer important. However, I strongly believe that these so-called "old-fashioned" standards are playing a big role in our lives in the modern society. Firstly, people still make important judgements of others based on their attitudes and personalities. For instance, there are job interviews. Corporates don't just see the education levels of a candidate when they hire new employees. They have job interviews to see how kind and trustable they are. These interviews play a significant role in deciding whether the person will be suitable for the job or not. These occasions are directly related to one's career path, so you cannot say that internal principles are no longer crucial. Secondly, these old-fashioned standards are significant as you'll be isolated in the society if you don't follow them. If you are disrespectful, unkind and rude, you probably won't be able to make friends and interact with others enjoyably, even if you are very wealthy and famous. You might even lose your wealth and fame with a negative attitude towards others. There are many celebrities, for example, who lose their status because of some deeds that go against the basic moral ideas. Inner beauty is as important as economical success as without it your accomplishments can be taken away. Overall, although some may think that old-fashioned values are no longer crucial in our lives, it is evident that this is not true. Judgements are still made by moral principles, while they are needed to interact with others and avoid isolation, too. Therefore, we should never overlook the importance of inner beauty.
It's a common belief that in the contemporary world,
people
are judged
with social status and economical possessions.
Some
people
think
that values such as honor, trust and kindness are no longer
important
.
However
, I
strongly
believe that these
so
-called
"
old
-fashioned
"
standards are playing a
big
role in our
lives
in the modern society.

Firstly
,
people
still
make
important
judgements of others based on their attitudes and personalities.
For instance
, there are job interviews.
Corporates
don't
just
see
the education levels of a candidate when they hire new employees. They have job interviews to
see
how kind and trustable they are. These interviews play a significant role in deciding whether the person will be suitable for the job or not. These occasions are
directly
related to one's career path,
so
you cannot say that internal principles are no longer crucial.

Secondly
, these
old
-fashioned standards are significant as you'll
be isolated
in the society if you don't follow them. If you are disrespectful, unkind and rude, you
probably
won't be able to
make
friends and interact with others
enjoyably
, even if you are
very
wealthy and
famous
. You might even lose your wealth and fame with a
negative
attitude towards others. There are
many
celebrities,
for example
, who lose their status
because
of
some
deeds that go against the basic moral
ideas
. Inner beauty is as
important
as
economical
success as without it your accomplishments can
be taken
away.

Overall
, although
some
may
think
that
old
-fashioned values are no longer crucial in our
lives
, it is evident that this is not true. Judgements are
still
made by moral principles, while they
are needed
to interact with others and avoid isolation, too.
Therefore
, we should never overlook the importance of inner beauty.
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IELTS essay Are internal values still important?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
290 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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