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Animal-assisted therapy is beneficial. TOEFL integrated essay

Animal-assisted therapy is beneficial. TOEFL integrated essay Aja7n
The author asserts that animal-assisted therapy is utilized to enhance emotional and physical health, similarly the speaker tells us about the research that showed positive effects of pet ownership on heart health. The author explains that how pets enhance both emotional and physical health. Pets are well-known as source of emotional support. They are convenient partner for lonely people. Also, people can become friend with pets easily because they have good manner. In addition, pets give their owner opportunity for entertainments. Pets get comforts to their owner to relieve from emotional stress or worried. Pet are good for physical health, as well. People who have high blood can improve their treatment by petting and talking to pets. Doing physical activity is another opportunity that is provided by pets. Also, they give a people chance to play. People who care pets are less require to go to doctor than non-pet owner. Finally, pet therapy is used with elderly people. The speaker supports pet therapy. she relates a study that pets bring about positive effect on health of heart patients. Half of patient took care of a dog (had to take care of) that included spend two hours a day caring for the pet. The other group of patient got traditional treatment which contained drug and physical therapy and dietary recommendation. After six months, the patients with dogs had lower blood pressure and they lost their weight than other patient. They also felt happier and less stressed. Finally, the majority of pet caretakers want to keep dog after the study. This study showed how pet therapy can improve physical health.
The author asserts that animal-assisted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
therapy
is utilized
to enhance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emotional
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
,
similarly
the speaker
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tells
us about the research that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects of pet ownership on heart health.

The author
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
that how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
enhance both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emotional
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Pets
are well-known as source of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emotional
support. They are convenient partner for lonely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can become friend with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
easily
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
manner.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
give their owner opportunity for entertainments.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Pets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
comforts to their owner to relieve from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emotional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
or worried. Pet are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
,
as well
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who have high blood can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their treatment by petting and talking to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
. Doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
activity is another opportunity that
is provided
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
.
Also
, they give a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
chance to play.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who care
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
are less require to go to doctor than non-pet owner.
Finally
, pet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
therapy
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
with elderly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

The speaker supports pet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
therapy
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
she
relates a study that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
bring about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
of heart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patients
. Half of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patient
took care of a dog (had to take care of) that included spend two hours a day caring for the pet. The other group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patient
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
traditional treatment which contained drug and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
therapy
and dietary recommendation. After six months, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patients
with dogs had lower blood
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
pressure and
they lost their weight than other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patient
. They
also
felt happier and less
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
.
Finally
, the majority of pet caretakers want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
dog after the study. This study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
how pet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
therapy
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
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IELTS essay Animal-assisted therapy is beneficial. TOEFL integrated essay

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
268 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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