Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people say that it is better for children to grow up in a city, while others say that growing up in the countryside is better. Do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion.

Some people say that it is better for children to grow up in a city, while others say that growing up in the countryside is better. Give your opinion. oR1N3
The upbringing of a child has been a contentious issue for decades, and everyone has a different perspective on it. While some individuals argue that the countryside is the ideal environment for a child’s development, others believe that urban areas have better opportunities. I strongly concur to the latter opinion, because children learn how to adapt in this fast-paced world and also receive better provisions in urban regions. In this essay, this view shall be elaborated further. To begin with, the world is evolving impetuously and in order to cope with such an environment, children ought to live where everything foments. Most well-known and esteemed institutions and companies are located in the heart of the city. Hence, it would be convenient and opportunistic for young individuals to reside in such regions. For instance, a survey conducted in the United States reported that almost every multi-national companies prefer to construct and expand their businesses in an urban settlement because of the propinquity of college, universities and other modern facilities. As a result, it is evident that cities offer better opportunities than remote areas. Furthermore, although rural areas provide a serene and comfortable lifestyle, individuals still have to travel to cities for better facilities such as health, food and security. This instils a positive mindset, as parents not only need to provide but also protect their children. For example, it is often reported that rural hospitals are not well-equipped with the modernized technology and sometimes under-staffed in comparison to city hospitals. Consequently, parents find it much safer and secure for their children to be raised in an advanced and modern environment. To summarize, Even though the lifestyle in the countryside seem fascinating and peaceful, it is the amenities, opportunities and infrastructure in the cities that prove to be more beneficial. Therefore, I believe that children would adapt much faster and better when they reside in cities.
The upbringing of a child has been a contentious issue for decades, and everyone has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
perspective on it. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals argue that the countryside is the ideal environment for a child’s development, others believe that urban areas have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
opportunities. I
strongly
concur to the latter opinion,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
learn how to adapt in this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-paced world and
also
receive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
provisions in urban regions. In this essay, this view shall
be elaborated
further
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the world is evolving
impetuously
and in order to cope with such an environment,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
ought to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
where everything foments. Most well-known and esteemed institutions and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
are located
in the heart of the city.
Hence
, it would be convenient and opportunistic for young individuals to reside in such regions.
For instance
, a survey conducted in the United States reported that almost every multi-national
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
prefer to construct and expand their businesses in an urban settlement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the propinquity of college, universities and other modern facilities.
As a result
, it is evident that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
offer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
opportunities than remote areas.

Furthermore
, although rural areas provide a serene and comfortable lifestyle, individuals
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
travel to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
facilities such as health, food and security. This
Possible spelling mistake. 'instils' is British English.
instils
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
mindset, as parents not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
need to provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
protect their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
For example
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
reported that rural hospitals are not well-equipped with the modernized technology and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
under-staffed
in comparison
to city hospitals.
Consequently
, parents find it much safer and secure for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
be raised
in an advanced and modern environment.

To summarize
,
Even though
the lifestyle in the countryside seem fascinating and peaceful, it is the amenities, opportunities and infrastructure in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
that prove to be more beneficial.
Therefore
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
would adapt much faster and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
when they reside in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Some people say that it is better for children to grow up in a city, while others say that growing up in the countryside is better. Give your opinion.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Some people say that it is better for children to grow up in a city, while others say that growing up in the countryside is better. Do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion.