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An opinion holds that parents should be responsible for educating children to become perfect humans of a community, while another asserts that schooling is the duty of educational institutions.

An opinion holds that parents should be responsible for educating children to become perfect humans of a community, while another asserts that schooling is the duty of educational institutions. yLbVg
It can be said that education plays an important role in children's development to become good members of society. However, some people argue that children should be taught by parents, while others highly recommend the importance of schools. Considering both approaches, it is clear that there is value in the combination of families and schools. Firstly, the merit of traditional teaching at school is considered. Since the time of the ancient Greeks and Chinese and perhaps before, we have clung to the idea of schools, the places that provide a range of knowledge for students. This model has been tested and survived the ages. Moreover, children who go to schools are able to be wiser and more mature when they communicate with their friends. They can coordinate play with other students, manage conflicts and keep interaction positive. That is truly necessary for one citizen in society. That said, teaching by parents also has its own upside. For example, parents can pay for tuition and their children can attend online courses via an Internet connection at home. Therefore, students become more independent and more self-studied. Furthermore, parents have a chance to talk, share, and understand their kids. Especially, in the Covid-19 pandemic, parent's value in educating children is more and more cruel than ever. On the other hand, there is no tremendous peer pressure to compete with anyone so students can be more confident to develop skills and concentrate on what they adore. So while we should harness the potential of education from parents, we should not neglect the benefits of traditional learning. In short, no matter which environment students learn, the key point is that they have to really enjoy, make efforts and simultaneously cultivate moral values to become good global citizens in the world.
It can
be said
that education plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in children's development to become
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
members of society.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
be taught
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
, while others
highly
recommend the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
. Considering both approaches, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that there is value in the combination of families and schools.

Firstly
, the merit of traditional teaching at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is considered
. Since the time of the ancient Greeks and Chinese and perhaps
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, we have clung to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
, the places that provide a range of knowledge for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. This model has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tested
and survived the ages.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
are able to be wiser and more mature when they communicate with their friends. They can coordinate play with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, manage conflicts and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
interaction
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
.
That is
truly
necessary for one citizen in society.

That said, teaching by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
also
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
upside.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
can pay for tuition and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can attend online courses via an Internet connection at home.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
become more independent and more self-studied.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
have a chance to talk, share, and understand their kids.
Especially
, in the Covid-19 pandemic, parent's value in educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is more and more cruel than ever.
On the other hand
, there is no tremendous peer pressure to compete with anyone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can be more confident to develop
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and concentrate on what they adore.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
while we should harness the potential of education from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
, we should not neglect the benefits of traditional learning. In short, no matter which environment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
learn, the key point is that they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
really
enjoy,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
efforts and
simultaneously
cultivate moral values to become
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
global citizens in the world.
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IELTS essay An opinion holds that parents should be responsible for educating children to become perfect humans of a community, while another asserts that schooling is the duty of educational institutions.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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