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An increasing number of families have computers at home what are the advantages and disadvantages of internet access for minors

An increasing number of families have computers at home what are the advantages and disadvantages of internet access for minors E2Nq
It cannot be denied fact that technology has revolutionised world with leaps and bounds in modern era everyone depend on electric gadgets many of families have computers at home that they think that using internet can have positive and negative on child life this essay will discuss merits and demerits in details before portraying any relevant conclusion To commence with, there are multifaries reasons to support my nation internet is useful in child life firstly, by using they can learn many things teenagers can use internet their studies for example, it was very useful during COVID-19 that time whole world was lockdown and their was no options how child do their study finally with the help of internet all teacher teach children while sitting their own with help internet moreover, in leasure time they can send their by listening music and it is also good moments to watch entertainment movie with their family finally, child can sharp their sharp their by play different types of game. On other hand, when it come its negative point. first and foremost, using internet child can get many heath issue like while sitting front of computer their eyes sites can become week. secondly, nowadays government are promoting movie related to crime and drugs so today youth watching these types movies of and they started these trend that can also very harmful for them because child can involve in crime and other activities. Finally, there are my dangerous game that game can force to child to commit suïcide for example, in previous year there was one blue game teenager addicted that game many of them commit suïcide so government should ban on illegal games. In conclusion, in my opinion child should internet in limit while using more they can get many Heath issues.
It cannot
be denied
fact that technology has
Possible spelling mistake. 'revolutionised' is British English.
revolutionised
world with leaps and bounds in modern era everyone
The pronoun 'everyone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "depends", "depended".
depend
on electric gadgets
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of families have computers at home that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that using internet can have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
life this essay will discuss merits and demerits in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
portraying any relevant conclusion To commence with, there are
Possible spelling mistake found.
multifaries
reasons to support my nation internet is useful in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
life
firstly
, by using they can learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
internet their studies
for example
, it was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
useful during COVID-19 that time whole world was lockdown and
Did you mean "there"?
their
was no options how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
do their study
finally
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of internet all teacher teach children while sitting their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
internet
moreover
, in
Possible spelling mistake found.
leasure
time they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their by listening music and it is
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
moments to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
entertainment movie with their family
finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
can
This phrase is duplicated. You should probably leave only "sharp their".
sharp their sharp their
by play
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of game. On other hand, when it
Did you mean "comes"?
come
its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
point.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
first
and foremost, using internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
heath issue like while sitting front of computer their eyes sites can become week.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
secondly
, nowadays
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
are promoting movie related to crime and drugs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
youth watching these types movies
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
of and
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
these trend that can
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
harmful for them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
can involve in crime and other activities.
Finally
, there are my
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
game that game can force to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
to commit
Possible spelling mistake found.
suïcide
for example
, in previous year there was one blue game
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
addicted that game
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of them commit
Possible spelling mistake found.
suïcide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should ban on illegal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
.
In conclusion
, in my opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
should internet in limit while using more they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Heath issues.
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IELTS essay An increasing number of families have computers at home what are the advantages and disadvantages of internet access for minors

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
298 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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