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agree or disagree that car in the next twenty years will be decreased

agree or disagree that car in the next twenty years will be decreased ldYWK
Technology provides a lot of products which become essential parts of our life, almost everybody has a car. many individuals believe that by the time car's number will be increased progressively. In my opinion, I believe that automobile numbers will decrease radically over time. This reduction will be happened due to economical and healthy considerations. Firstly, let's start with the economical factors. No one can deny that all the world witness a bad economical condition. Due to the fact, the cars need a lot of expense to buy it's fuel, maintenance, and it's spare parts, having cars is no good choice. Having a car is considered having another house with extra payment. Furthermore, many governments have been determined a certain number of cars be licensed every year. Furthermore, they impose extra fees on cars to renew their license. That is because more cars need more infrastructure like roads, gas stations, and services along all the roads. For example, when I renewed my car license this year I paid about double what I paid the last year. Another orientation from governments is to encourage the citizens to use public transportation by enhancing the buses service. Secondly, Cars have adversely affected the environment and the owner's healthy. Firstly, much research asserts that cars are considered as the main contributor to environmental pollution, due to it is the main source of carbon dioxide. This gas is responsible for global warming disasters, in addition to that, it may cause damage to children's brain tissues. This fact emerged during coronavirus disease. When most people stayed at their homes, research asserts that the recovery rate of the environment has been increased. Then, for the owner healthy, cars increase the rate of laziness. People become dependent on cars even their destinations were near. Consequently, the fat disease has been increased to become a popular disease all over the world. Fat disease increases all illnesses such as heart disease, pressure, and sugar disease. In conclusion, Although cars are considered one of our life's essential, It may cause a lot of damage to our environment and health. Consequently, many individuals have been oriented to use public transportation. Furthermore, many governments encourage to leaving cars and using public transportation.
Technology provides
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
products which become essential parts of our life, almost everybody has a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
many
individuals believe that by the time car's number will
be increased
progressively
. In my opinion, I believe that automobile numbers will decrease
radically
over time. This reduction will
be happened
due to economical and healthy considerations.

Firstly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with the
Did you mean "economic" (=connected with economy)?
economical
factors. No one can deny that all the world witness a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
economical condition. Due to the fact, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
expense to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
Did you mean "its" (possessive pronoun) instead of 'it's' (=it is)?
it's
fuel, maintenance, and it's spare parts, having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
is no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
choice. Having a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is considered
having another
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
with extra payment.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
have
been determined
a certain number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
be licensed
every year.
Two successive sentences begin with the same adverb. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
Furthermore
, they impose extra fees on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
to renew their license.
That is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
need more infrastructure like roads, gas stations, and services along all the roads.
For example
, when I renewed my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
license this year I paid about double what I paid the last year. Another orientation from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
is to encourage the citizens to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
public transportation by enhancing the buses service.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Cars
have
adversely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
the environment and the owner's healthy.
Firstly
, much research asserts that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
are considered
as the main contributor to environmental pollution, due to it is the main source of carbon dioxide. This gas is responsible for global warming disasters,
in addition
to that, it may cause damage to children's brain tissues. This fact emerged during coronavirus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
. When most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
stayed at their homes, research asserts that the recovery rate of the environment has
been increased
. Then, for the owner healthy,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
increase the rate of laziness.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
become dependent on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
even their destinations were near.
Consequently
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
has
been increased
to become a popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
all over the world.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Fat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
increases all illnesses such as heart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
, pressure, and sugar disease.

In conclusion
, Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
are considered
one of our life's essential, It may cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
damage to our environment and health.
Consequently
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
individuals have
been oriented
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
public transportation.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
encourage to leaving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
and using public transportation.
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IELTS essay agree or disagree that car in the next twenty years will be decreased

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
369 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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