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Advertising encourage consumers to buy in quantity rather than promoting quality. Is it true or not

Advertising encourage consumers to buy in quantity rather than promoting quality. Is it true or not Rw3GV
Well nowadays most of the people prefer online shopping. Because of what with the help of advertising they can easily buying and selling. And in this way they encourage the consumers to buy in quantities rather then promoting quality. So that is true and i will discuss some points in upcoming paragraphs. To begin with in these days people can like online shopping because of what with the help of advertising they can easily seen more thing related to the latest trend. As wall as they buy on online services. They received more discounts offer and savings more money
Well nowadays most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer online shopping.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of what with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of advertising they can
easily
The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: "buy"
buying
and selling. And in this way they encourage the consumers to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
in quantities
rather
Did you mean "than"? 'than' is used for comparisons, 'then' is an expression of time.
then
promoting quality.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that is
true and
Did you mean "I"?
i
will discuss
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
points in upcoming paragraphs. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with in these days
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can like online shopping
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of what with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of advertising they can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
more thing related to the latest trend. As wall as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
on online services. They received more discounts offer and savings more
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
money

IELTS essay Advertising encourage consumers to buy in quantity rather than promoting quality. Is it true or not

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
98 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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