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Advertisements are everywhere affecting our lives. Discuss the subject

Nowadays, it is a well known fact that advertisements are gaining more and more popularity among the world. In this point proponents of this view claim that ads do not affect people’s lives while competitors believe that people are being affected by ads. In my view people can be easily affected By ads for various reasons. To begin with, people especially youngsters are being all the more exposed to ads that showing off a glamorous and luxurious lifestyle which is a far cry from reality. However, people are perpetually compare themselves with this glamorous lifestyle and they end up feeling worthless and suffering from mental disorders, such as depression. Additionally, ads showcase distorted images of beauty. This practice not only underestimate the roles and personality of the two genders, but also lead young people to eating disorders in order to reach these standards and even to suicidal tendencies. Secondly, it is undeniable that media play a main role in our lives as we are unable to escape from them. For instance are not constrained only in television but also in radio, in our mobile phones and in digital hoards and posters on streets. This means that we are being exposed to implicit and explicit messages in every aspect of our live. What is more by the constant brainwash from media we are treated as potential Byers and thus can turn a person into over consumer who is being obsessed with material world with lack of critical thinking. Taking everything into account, social media influence people’s lives a great deal. It is vital so that people try to resist against these messages and become critical thinking
Nowadays, it is a well known fact that advertisements are gaining more and more popularity among the world. In this point proponents of this view claim that ads do not affect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
while competitors believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by ads. In my view
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can be
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
By ads for various reasons.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
especially
youngsters are being all the more exposed to ads that showing off a glamorous and luxurious lifestyle which is a far cry from reality.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
perpetually
compare themselves with this glamorous lifestyle and they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up feeling worthless and suffering from mental disorders, such as depression.
Additionally
, ads showcase distorted images of beauty. This practice not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
underestimate the roles and personality of the two genders,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
lead young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to eating disorders in order to reach these standards and even to suicidal tendencies.

Secondly
, it is undeniable that media play a main role in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
as we are unable to escape from them.
For instance
are not constrained
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in television
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
in radio, in our mobile phones and in digital hoards and posters on streets. This means that we are
being exposed
to implicit and explicit messages in every aspect of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
.
What is more
by the constant brainwash from media we
are treated
as potential Byers and
thus
can turn a person into over consumer who is
being obsessed
with material world with lack of critical thinking.

Taking everything into account, social media influence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
a great deal. It is vital
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
try to resist against these messages and become critical thinking

IELTS essay Advertisements are everywhere affecting our lives. Discuss the subject

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
274 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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