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Advantages and disadvantages studying in universities v.2

In last few years, number of students in universities has shown increasing trend. General people see this increase as positive step as the overall education level of society is shifting upwards, some of the groups are concerned that upward demand of higher education will impact its quality negatively. The essay will cover both sides of changing situation. Firstly advantages, increase in the university students shows that the awareness about higher education is increasing in the community. It will allow people from the lower economic group to get better jobs and security. This will aid to improve social challenges such as reduction of uneven wealth distribution. Which will enable people will be able to fulfill their basic living needs. On the flip side, the rate of opening new universities is slower than that of increasing students. This will result in crowded class rooms in universities. Secondly, more students will require more resources such as higher number of professors, multiple class rooms / labs. it will also force universities to operate more working hours to cater the requirement. As universities generally operate on public money, with limited funds, it is not possible to maintain same quality of professors or resources with increasing demand. The compromised budget will lead to the poor quality of education delivery. This will impact the overall education quality for all students. Additionally, surge in higher number of graduates will create the scarcity in job market. In conclusion, improving number of university students has many positive impact on society, its negative side has also considerable influence on education quality. The government and educational institute should work actively to maintain the quality of education.
In last few years,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
has shown
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increasing
trend. General
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
this increase as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
step as the
overall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
level of society is shifting upwards,
If the text is a generality, ‘of the’ is not necessary.
some of the
groups
are concerned
that upward demand of higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
will impact its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
negatively
. The essay will cover both sides of changing situation.

Firstly
advantages, increase in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that the awareness about higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increasing
in the community. It will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from the lower economic group to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better jobs and security. This will aid to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
social challenges such as reduction of uneven wealth distribution.
“Which” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Which
will enable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will be able to fulfill their basic living needs.

On the flip side, the rate of opening new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
is slower than that of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. This will result in crowded
The noun “classrooms” is spelled as one word.
class rooms
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
.
Secondly
, more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will require more resources such as higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of professors, multiple
The noun “classrooms” is spelled as one word.
class rooms
/ labs.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
it
will
also
force
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
to operate more working hours to cater the requirement. As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
generally
operate on public money, with limited funds, it is not possible to maintain same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of professors or resources with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increasing
demand. The compromised budget will lead to the poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
delivery. This will impact the
overall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
Additionally
, surge in higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of graduates will create the scarcity in job market.

In conclusion
, improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on society, its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
side has
also
considerable influence on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and educational institute should work
actively
to maintain the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
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IELTS essay There has been a dramatic growth in the number of people studying at universities in the last few decades. While some people see this as a positive trend which raises the general level of education within the community, others fear that it is lowering the quality of education. What are the advantages and disadvantages of the increase in student numbers at university?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
274 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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