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ADVANTAGES AND DISADVANTAGES OF MASS TOURISM

ADVANTAGES AND DISADVANTAGES OF MASS TOURISM y7jLJ
Tourism is a smoke-free industry, one that has brought a source of revenue to the National Economy. Tourism has numerous advantages besides that, it has disadvantages too. Mass tourism has lots of advantages. First of all, the tourists will have good graphs of languages. For instance, when they are traveling abroad they will have a chance to communicate with the indigenous people, and they will enhance their speaking skills and broaden their horizons. Secondly, tourism is a huge source of profit. It will attract investment from multi-national companies. For example, some investors come to many developing countries to survey the market. As a result, this will boost economic growth. Finally, the tourism industry helps offer more employment opportunities for the locals. Because many companies invest in services like restaurants or hotels. Therefore, job seekers can get a proper income for their living. On the other hand, mass tourism not only has advantages but also has disadvantages. Firstly, mass tourism may spoil the landscapes. For instance, to upgrades infrastructure so many businesses destroy the natural habitats to build hotels, markets. Secondly, it will create pollution. Many people are low awareness, after drinking, they throw the plastic bottles instead of throwing them in the trash. In a nutshell, tourism has popularity in developing countries because it is a profitable economy. However, it is a catastrophe if it is out of control.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tourism
is a smoke-free industry, one that has brought a source of revenue to the National Economy.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tourism
has numerous advantages
besides
that, it has disadvantages too.

Mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
has lots of advantages.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the tourists will have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
graphs of languages.
For instance
, when they are traveling abroad they will have a chance to communicate with the indigenous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, and they will enhance their speaking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and broaden their horizons.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
is a huge source of profit. It will attract investment from multi-national
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
investors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
to survey the market.
As a result
, this will boost economic growth.
Finally
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
industry
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
offer more employment opportunities for the locals.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
invest in services like restaurants or hotels.
Therefore
, job seekers can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a proper income for their living.

On the other hand
, mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
has advantages
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
has disadvantages.
Firstly
, mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
may spoil the landscapes.
For instance
, to upgrades infrastructure
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
businesses
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
the natural habitats to build hotels, markets.
Secondly
, it will create pollution.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are low awareness, after drinking, they throw the plastic bottles
instead
of throwing them in the trash.

In a nutshell,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
has popularity in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is a profitable economy.
However
, it is a catastrophe if it is out of control.
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IELTS essay ADVANTAGES AND DISADVANTAGES OF MASS TOURISM

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
229 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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