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advantage and disadvantage on foregin language

advantage and disadvantage on foregin language 7005Y
Nowadays people are immigrating themselves to various parts of the world. This is a need to live a sorted life. people need language for communication. Everyone has a mother tongue. Furthermore, they need a second language. This language will help to improve modern lifestyle. Although improving our social lifestyle it is important. Language has an impact in our daily life. It created new opportunities, help to make money, meet new people and culture. therefore learning can not make problems to our daily lifestyle. living in another country and using a foreign language not only help to develop but also help to be socialized. on the other hand we can observe that if one is living in a foreign country he is far from his culture and tradition. This can make a person depressed as he can not live like as he was used to. this grief can make someone's life miserable. Changing a country is like changing roots. So it creates a hunger to meet people from the same region. He thinks that it will help him to cope up to stay in a new place. More or less we can say having a second language have benefits as well as disadvantages. After all we are running in a race to live, many times we have to maintain those things which we do not want to do.
Nowadays
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are immigrating themselves to various parts of the world. This is a need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a sorted life.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
people
need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
for communication. Everyone has a mother tongue.
Furthermore
, they need a second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
modern lifestyle.
“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
improving our social lifestyle it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Language
has an impact in our daily life. It created new opportunities,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
money,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and culture.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
therefore
learning can not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
problems to our daily lifestyle.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
living
in another country and using a foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to develop
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to
be socialized
.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
the other hand we can observe that if one is living in a foreign country he is far from his culture and tradition. This can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a person depressed as he can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
like as he was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to. this grief can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
someone's life miserable. Changing a country is like changing roots.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it creates a hunger to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from the same region. He
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thinks
that it will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
him to cope up to stay in a new place.

More or less we can say having a second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
have benefits
as well
as disadvantages.
After all
we are running in a race to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
times we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
maintain those things which we do not want to do.
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IELTS essay advantage and disadvantage on foregin language

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
227 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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