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advantage and disadvantage of popularity

There is no doubt that there have a lot of renowed individuals in the world and they have their own obstacles and crucial problems. In this essay, I will firstly discuss the causes of problem and some merits for individuals. In my view, the primary cause of the problem is that individual's popularirty gives them a lot of obstacles and anxiety since they are not able to do something comfotly. In recent times, however, situations report that famous people are not willingly to be more prominent because of problem, struggles and etc. As a result we can say polularity has some disadvantages for individuals. In order to, overcome this problems renowed individuals opt to keep themselves secret since at that time they feel more blissful and convenient. Of course, details portrays that these ways are appropriate and efficient for popular people. In summary, being prominent have some benefits and disadvantages for individuals so there have sollutions for all issues.
There is no doubt that there have
a lot of
renowed
individuals in the
world and
they have their
own
obstacles and crucial
problems
. In this essay, I will
firstly
discuss the causes of
problem
and
some
merits for individuals.

In my view, the primary cause of the
problem
is that individual's
popularirty
gives them
a lot of
obstacles and anxiety since they are not able to do something
comfotly
.
In
recent times,
however
, situations report that
famous
people
are not
willingly
to be more prominent
because
of
problem
, struggles
and etc
.
As a result
we can say
polularity
has
some
disadvantages for individuals.

In order to, overcome
this
problems
renowed
individuals opt to
keep
themselves secret since at that time they feel more blissful and convenient.
Of course
,
details
portrays that these ways are appropriate and efficient for popular
people
.

In summary, being prominent
have
some
benefits and disadvantages for individuals
so
there have
sollutions
for all issues.
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IELTS essay advantage and disadvantage of popularity

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
159 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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