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ESSAY ON GOALS, EXPERIENCE & STRONG DESIRE TO PURSUE MS DEGREE

Information is the oil of the 21st Century, and analytics is the combustion engine. I further researched on this line and found how valuable the data is today to be further worked upon. Not just did I come across exploring the outstanding applications in various range of sectors adapted by core technology companies but also how fields such as healthcare, manufacturing and several others derive business intelligence from data. I understood that for a business to flourish, it is important to understand the hits and misses and Business analytics was just the right leverage. This field aimed at deriving Business Intelligence out of raw data and in turn saving a lot of cost for companies. An opportunity to be a part of this field had immediately become my inspiration. Moving on with time, having amassed a rich 3. 5 year experience in the data & analytical industry, I strongly believe that a graduate degree from LeBow College of Business will provide me the insightful learning experience towards strengthening my existing skill sets and further flourishing in this vast and exciting field. This course will not only prepare me for a Business or a Data Analyst role but also instil in me the skills to not only comprehend what data to analyse, however to leverage that data for a strategic decision making process and be market-ready. I got an exciting opportunity to work as an Associate Analyst in my previous firm, a data analytics company focused on delivering cutting edge solutions in the ‘data to intelligence’ lifecycle to the Banking, Financial Services & Insurance (BFSI) vertical in India & UAE. I formulated, implemented and developed various reports, metadata inventories, analysed data, built predictive models, BRDs, FRDs, and so forth. Initially during my 10 months stint in this company, I faced plethora of challenges in terms of building Requirement Analysis (RA) sheets, Conflicts with Stakeholders, Undocumented processes, Data Reconciliation Issues, inexact business requirements, etc. I got adapted to these challenges subsequently by starting to analyse the data and to derive a desired business-oriented approach and solution by successfully delivering the project on time. A vital experience gained in the industry so far, my career received a boost as I delightfully set foot in CRISIL Ltd, a credit rating firm that is also majorly focused on the Business Intelligence and Data Warehousing domain. As a Software Engineer, I have gained an International experience working with multicultural business users in Abu Dhabi, UAE where I contributed towards the Global Markets Division, Retail Banking & Business Banking Division in a complete End-to-End process that involved Analytical and Technical skills, Problem Solving skills, Data Analysis, Requirement gathering as well as building User Interface Reports to monitor the daily Business as usual Activities and tracking back the portfolios for various Banking Divisions in order to perform Stress Testing over their data and provide an absolute Dashboard / Reports using tools like Oracle Business Intelligence (OBIEE), Power BI, Oracle Data Integrator, and so forth. A profound International work experience of more than three plus years at CRISIL in Abu Dhabi not only provided me an opportunity to work with global clients from diverse countries but gave me a platform to experience various cultures in our team while building robust professional connections within as well as outside the organisation. This has helped me broadly comprehend the nuances, processes and most significantly the importance of business and data analytics at a global level. A privilege of being a part of an exciting global work environment truly makes me elated to acknowledge that this very field has been my true calling. I am certain this degree will help me expand my preliminary knowledge in the field and equip myself with the necessary skill set that can take my career forward exponentially in the long run. I am particularly interested in subjects pertaining to Business Performance Analysis, Database Management Systems, Fundamentals of Business Analytics and Data Visualization which are at the core of the curriculum offered at your esteemed university. Chaojiang Wu, PhD, Assistant Professor, Decision Sciences and MIS, developed a decision model for managing risk and measurable uncertainty. The work was published on IISE Transactions, the flagship journal of the Institute of Industrial and Systems Engineers. This model had guided decision makers to optimally choose decision alternatives to manage risk. I look forward to being recognized as a Business Analyst in a top notch multinational company to be able to be a decision maker by managing such risks, help facilitate the decision alternatives and charter the ever changing terrain of intense competition, political uncertainty and rapidly changing technology through optimising the best of my sound international experience. As a prospective student, I bring with me a mature industry experience of working in data intensive organizations possessing an innate understanding of how data can be utilized unerringly for the benefit of the companies in the market today thus enabling differentiation among the peers.
Information is the oil of the 21st Century, and analytics is the combustion engine. I
further
researched on this line and found how valuable the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
to be
further
worked upon. Not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
did I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
across exploring the outstanding applications in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
range of sectors adapted by core technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fields
such as healthcare, manufacturing and several others derive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
intelligence
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
. I understood that for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
to flourish, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to understand the hits and misses and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
analytics was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
the right leverage.

This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
aimed at deriving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Intelligence
out of raw
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
and in turn saving
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
cost for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
. An opportunity to be a part of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
had immediately become my inspiration. Moving on with time, having amassed a rich 3. 5 year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
& analytical industry, I
strongly
believe that a graduate degree from
Possible spelling mistake found.
LeBow
College of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
will provide me the insightful learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
towards strengthening my existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
sets and
further
flourishing in this vast and exciting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
. This course will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
prepare me for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
or a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Data
Analyst role
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
Possible spelling mistake. ‘instil’ is British English.
instil
in me the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
to not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
comprehend what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
to
Possible spelling mistake. ‘analyse’ is British English.
analyse
,
however
to leverage that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
for a strategic
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.
decision making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
and be market-ready.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
an exciting opportunity to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as an Associate Analyst in my previous firm, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
analytics
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
focused on delivering cutting edge solutions in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
‘data
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
intelligence’
lifecycle to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Banking
, Financial Services & Insurance (
Possible spelling mistake found.
BFSI
) vertical in India & UAE. I formulated, implemented and developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
reports, metadata inventories,
Possible spelling mistake. ‘analysed’ is British English.
analysed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
, built predictive models,
Possible spelling mistake found.
BRDs
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
FRDs
, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
forth.
Initially
during my 10 months stint in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
, I faced plethora of challenges in terms of building Requirement Analysis (RA) sheets, Conflicts with Stakeholders, Undocumented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
processes
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Data
Reconciliation Issues, inexact
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
requirements, etc. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
adapted to these challenges
subsequently
by starting to
Possible spelling mistake. ‘analyse’ is British English.
analyse
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
and to derive a desired business-oriented approach and solution by
successfully
delivering the project on time.

A vital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
gained in the industry
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
far, my career received a boost as I
delightfully
set foot in
Possible spelling mistake found.
CRISIL
Ltd, a credit rating firm
that is
also
majorly
focused on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Intelligence
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Data
Warehousing domain. As a Software Engineer, I have gained an International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
working with multicultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
users in Abu Dhabi, UAE where I contributed towards the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Global
An apostrophe may be missing.
Markets
Division, Retail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Banking
&
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Banking
Division in a complete
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
End
-to-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
End
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
that involved Analytical and Technical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
,
This noun or verb “Problem-Solving” is spelled with a hyphen.
Problem Solving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Data
Analysis, Requirement gathering
as well
as building User Interface Reports to monitor the daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
as usual Activities and tracking back the portfolios for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Banking
Divisions in order to perform
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Stress
Testing over their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
and provide an absolute Dashboard / Reports using tools like Oracle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Intelligence
(
Possible spelling mistake found.
OBIEE
), Power BI, Oracle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Data
Integrator, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
forth. A profound International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
of more than three plus years at
Possible spelling mistake found.
CRISIL
in Abu Dhabi not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
provided me an opportunity to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
clients from diverse countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
gave me a platform to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
cultures in our team while building robust professional connections within
as well
as outside the
Possible spelling mistake. ‘organisation’ is British English.
organisation
. This has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
me
broadly
comprehend the nuances,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
processes
and most
significantly
the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
analytics at a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
level.

A privilege of being a part of an exciting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
environment
truly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
me elated to acknowledge that this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
has been my true calling. I am certain this degree will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
me expand my preliminary knowledge in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
and equip myself with the necessary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
set that can take my career forward
exponentially
in the long run. I am
particularly
interested in subjects pertaining to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
Performance Analysis, Database Management Systems, Fundamentals of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
Analytics and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Data
Visualization which are at the core of the curriculum offered at your esteemed university.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Chaojiang
Wu, PhD, Assistant Professor,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Decision
Sciences and MIS, developed a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
model for managing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
and measurable uncertainty. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
was published
on
Possible spelling mistake found.
IISE
Transactions, the flagship journal of the Institute of Industrial and Systems Engineers. This model had guided
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
makers to
optimally
choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
alternatives to manage
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
. I look forward to
being recognized
as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
Analyst in a
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.
top notch
multinational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
to be able to be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
maker by managing such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
facilitate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
alternatives and charter the
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.
ever changing
terrain of intense competition, political uncertainty and
rapidly
changing technology through
Possible spelling mistake. ‘optimising’ is British English.
optimising
the best of my sound international experience.

As a prospective student, I bring with me a mature industry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
of working in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
intensive
Do not mix variants of the same word (‘organization’ and ‘organisation’) within a single text.
organizations
possessing an innate understanding of how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
can
be utilized
unerringly
for the benefit of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
in the market
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
thus
enabling differentiation among the peers.
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IELTS essay ESSAY ON GOALS, EXPERIENCE & STRONG DESIRE TO PURSUE MS DEGREE

Essay
  American English
7 paragraphs
821 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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