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According to some people, the perfect vacation is going to the beach and relaxing in the sun, while others prefer to go camping in the mountains. Discuss both views and give your opinion. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

According to some people, the perfect vacation is going to the beach and relaxing in the sun, while others prefer to go camping in the mountains. 1bnAN
Nowadays, there are so many ways to enjoy the holiday. Someone think going to the is so amazing and they prefer the ocean, whereas others believe the most grateful is climbing. I think both of this views are fine, no matter where we stay, just relax we can feel our perfect vacation. This essay will clear up those views and shares my opinion about that. Firstly, I couldn’t agree more with the fact that beaches is one of the most popular places to enjoy. In Vietnam, we are so lucky cause of plenty of different beaches. If we go to the seaside, it’s better climate. The health will improve when we are on the coastline. For example, I usually sunbathe and get so much vitamin D when I visit the seaside. Specifically, nightlife in coastal city is more lively with lots of leisure activities. We definately go to the night market or beach walk. That sounds so exciting. On the other hand, going camping on mountains is also a great idea. Once we go to the mountains, we can completely disconnect and escape the business of city life, I could even connect to nature. I used to go camping on moutains and I could see the city’s view and i fell so fascinated. The atmosphere on mountains is actually fresh, I walked on the grass even through the small forest. That’s really amazing. In conclusion, a place to take a holiday is not so vital. From my point, purposes are more important, I mean If I want to take care my mental health, it will be better to go to the mountains because I can avoid the sparkling of city. However, If I want to reduce my physical or have fun, I prefer going to sea. Actually, we absolutely combines those place together, kind of a city not only has a long coastline, but has specticular mountains.
Nowadays, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways to enjoy the holiday. Someone
The pronoun 'Someone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "thinks", "thought".
think
going to the is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
amazing and
they prefer the ocean, whereas others believe the most grateful is climbing. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
both of
Did you mean "these"?
this
views are fine, no matter where we stay,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
relax we can feel our perfect vacation. This essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
up those views and shares my opinion about that.

Firstly
, I couldn’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
more with the fact that beaches is one of the most popular places to enjoy. In Vietnam, we are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
lucky cause of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
beaches. If we go to the seaside, it’s better climate. The health will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
when we are on the coastline.
For example
, I
usually
sunbathe and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much vitamin D when I visit the seaside.
Specifically
, nightlife in coastal city is more lively with lots of leisure activities. We
Possible spelling mistake found.
definately
go to the night market or beach walk. That sounds
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
exciting.

On the other hand
, going camping on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mountains
is
also
a great
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
. Once we go to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mountains
, we can completely disconnect and escape the business of city life, I could even connect to nature. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to go camping on
Possible spelling mistake found.
moutains
and I could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the city’s view and
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
fell
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
fascinated. The atmosphere on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mountains
is actually fresh, I walked on the grass even through the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
forest. That’s
really
amazing.

In conclusion
, a place to take a holiday is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
vital. From my point, purposes are more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
, I mean If I want to take care my mental health, it will be better to go to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mountains
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I can avoid the sparkling of city.
However
, If I want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
my physical or have fun, I prefer going to sea. Actually, we
absolutely
The pronoun 'we' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "combine"
combines
those place together,
If 'kind' is a classification term, 'a' is not necessary. Use "kind of". (The phrases 'kind of' and 'sort of' are informal if they mean 'to some extent'.)
kind of a
city not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
has a long coastline,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
has
Possible spelling mistake found.
specticular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mountains
.
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IELTS essay According to some people, the perfect vacation is going to the beach and relaxing in the sun, while others prefer to go camping in the mountains.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
317 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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