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A university education should always include an internship or some type of a work experience. Do you agree or disagree. Provide some reasons and examples for your answer. v.1

A university education should always include an internship or some type of a work experience. Provide some reasons and examples for your answer. v. 1
“Over the last ten years, western societies have seen close to a 20% rise in the number of children who are overweight. This essay will discuss some reasons why this has occurred and examine the consequences of this worrying trend. The main cause of this problem is poor diet. Over the last decade there has been a prolific increase in the number of fast food restaurants. For example, on nearly every high street there is a MacDonald’s, Kentucky Fried Chicken and Pizza Hut. The food in these places has been proven to be very unhealthy, and much of the advertising is targeted at children, thus ensuring that they constitute the bulk of the customers of these establishments. However, it is not only due to eating out, but also the type of diet many children have at home. A lot of food consumed is processed food, especially with regards to ready-made meals which are a quick and easy option for parents who are working hard. The effects of this have been and will continue to be very serious. Firstly, there has been a large increase in health related diseases amongst children, especially diabetes. This debilitating illness means a child has to be injected with insulin for the rest of their life. Not only this, very overweight children often experience bullying from other children, which may affect their mental health. The negative stigma of being overweight may also affect self-esteem. To sum up, it is evident that there are several causes of obesity amongst children, and a variety of negative effects. Society must ensure steps are taken to prevent this problem from deteriorating further. ”
“Over the last ten years, western societies have
seen
close to a 20% rise in the number of
children
who are overweight. This essay will discuss
some
reasons why this has occurred and examine the consequences of this worrying trend.

The main cause of this problem is poor diet. Over the last decade there has been a prolific increase in the number of
fast
food
restaurants.
For example
, on
nearly
every high street there is a MacDonald’s, Kentucky Fried Chicken and Pizza Hut. The
food
in these places has
been proven
to be
very
unhealthy, and much of the advertising
is targeted
at
children
,
thus
ensuring that they constitute the bulk of the customers of these establishments.
However
, it is not
only
due to eating out,
but
also
the type of diet
many
children
have at home.
A lot of
food
consumed
is processed
food
,
especially
with regards to
ready-made meals which are a quick and easy option for parents who are working
hard
.

The effects of this have been and will continue to be
very
serious.
Firstly
, there has been a large increase in health related diseases amongst
children
,
especially
diabetes. This debilitating illness means a child
has to
be injected
with insulin for the rest of their life. Not
only
this,
very
overweight
children
often
experience bullying from other
children
, which may affect their mental health. The
negative
stigma of being overweight may
also
affect self-esteem.

To sum up, it is evident that there are several causes of obesity amongst
children
, and a variety of
negative
effects. Society
must
ensure steps
are taken
to
prevent
this problem from deteriorating
further
. ”
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay A university education should always include an internship or some type of a work experience. Provide some reasons and examples for your answer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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