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A growing number of people feel that animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans must employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including uses for food and research.

A growing number of people feel that animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans must employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including uses for food and research. 8blk
There is a contentious argument between people over whether animals should have equalized rights as human beings. While others argue that mankind's needs come first, and animals can be used as sources to provide human needs including food and studies. This essay will discuss both sides. Furthermore, my personal opinion as the writer will be stated at the end. The most common reason why people who argue that animals' lives do not matter as humans might hold good intentions such as using animals in the medical field researches and studies to ease the process of examining a medicine to cure a disease. To elucidate, testing the COVID-19 vaccine on mice is better than killing people. Humans' health and safety come first. Moreover, others may claim that using animals to test cosmetic products before humans consume them is a positive use of animals in order to protect us as humans and to make sure products are safe enough for human beings. If not a rabbit or a mouse might die which is way better than sacrificing the life of a human. On the other hand, the vital reason why a number of people are defending animals and trying to equalize their life rights as humans is their sympathetic nature. They might feel sorry that living creatures are dying in pain to fulfill humans' desires whether it is food or putting a cosmetic product on. Furthermore, some companies do not care at all about hurting or killing animals. The most important goal for them is to earn money. In some situations, it is totally acceptable to behave compassionless. To elaborate, isolating cows from their newborns, or killing an animal in front of another are totally unacceptable behaviors for this group of people. To put in concisely, I bet each group has its beliefs, ideas, and reason. Personally, I believe I am on the fence, getting the benefit from animals by using them in experiments can be acceptable only if it is done with compassion. Improving the medical field and curing illnesses might matter more.
There is a contentious argument between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
over whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
should have equalized rights as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings. While others argue that mankind's needs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
first
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
as sources to provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
needs including food and studies. This essay will discuss both sides.
Furthermore
, my personal opinion as the writer will
be stated
at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
.

The most common reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who argue that animals'
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
do not matter as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
hold
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
intentions such as using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
in the medical field researches and studies to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
the process of examining a medicine to cure a disease. To elucidate, testing the COVID-19 vaccine on mice is better than killing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Humans' health and safety
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
first
.
Moreover
, others may claim that using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
cosmetic products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
consume them is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
in order to protect us as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure products are safe
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings. If not a rabbit or a mouse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
which is way better than sacrificing the life of a human.

On the other hand
, the vital reason why a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are defending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and trying to equalize their life rights as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
is their sympathetic nature. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
feel sorry that living creatures are dying in pain to fulfill humans' desires whether it is food or putting a cosmetic product on.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
do not care at all about hurting or killing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
. The most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
goal for them is to earn money. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
situations, it is
totally
acceptable to behave
Possible spelling mistake found.
compassionless
. To elaborate, isolating cows from their newborns, or killing an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
in front of another are
totally
unacceptable behaviors for this group of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

To put in
concisely
, I bet each group has its beliefs,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
, and reason.
Personally
, I believe I am on the fence, getting the benefit from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
by using them in experiments can be acceptable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
if it
is done
with compassion. Improving the medical field and curing illnesses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
matter more.
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IELTS essay A growing number of people feel that animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans must employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including uses for food and research.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
342 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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