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A government has a responsibility to its citizens to ensure their safety. Therefore, some people think that the government should increase spending on defense but spend less on social benefits. To what extent do you agree?

A government has a responsibility to its citizens to ensure their safety. Therefore, some people think that the government should increase spending on defense but spend less on social benefits. MMMkp
Undoubtedly, civilians are the priority of government itself by ensuring their needs as well as safety. Whereas, it is thought by many people that government should utilize the money more in defense rather than for the welfare of the citizens. However, this essay will shed light on both notions and would give my rational views that government should made an investment for the betterment of armed forces as well as do the needful for the residents of the country. A powerful government is that which has the ability to make their defense strong in case of any emergency and for that they invest their capital into useful ammunitions, fighter jets, weapons and defending protective gears. Government also takes care of the individuals involved in defense forces and provides so many benefits to their families by constructing army schools, government quarters, free trainings and government jobs after retirement from armed forces. For instance, the first batch of five Rafale jets arrived in India in 2020 from France nearly 4 years after Indian government had signed the agreement of the aircraft at a cost of 50, 000 crores. This investment was over the top but its worth to make a strong addition into the defense. On the other hand, state always provides new policies to increase social benefits for the commoners. Government is launching new schemes for the workers like Employee State Insurances, Provident funds, Pensions, Subsidies and many more just to fulfill the essentials of food, shelter and bread. To exemplify, during Covid-19 pandemic, governments of all over the world manages to provide all the essential goods like groceries and medicines as well as online banking and insurances were for great help. Each government invests a big amount on Covid-19 vaccine to ensure the well-being of their people. To conclude, from my book of knowledge, government is very well known about what is suitable for the country. Ministry of state using their wisdom to invest into such sectors where there is a scope to recover. In a nutshell, government is using their noodles at its best for the betterment of both.
Undoubtedly
, civilians are the priority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
itself by ensuring their needs as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as safety. Whereas, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should utilize the money more in defense
rather
than for the welfare of the citizens.
However
, this essay will shed light on both notions and would give my rational views that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
The verb 'should' requires the base form of the verb: "make"
made
an investment for the betterment of armed forces as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as do the needful for the residents of the country.

A powerful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is that which has the ability to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their defense strong in case of any emergency and for that they invest their capital into useful
Possible spelling mistake found.
ammunitions
, fighter jets, weapons and defending protective gears.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
also
takes care of the individuals involved in defense forces and provides
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits to their families by constructing army schools,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
quarters, free trainings and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
jobs after retirement from armed forces.
For instance
, the
first
batch of five
Possible spelling mistake found.
Rafale
jets arrived in India in 2020 from France
nearly
4 years after Indian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
had signed the agreement of the aircraft at a cost of 50, 000 crores. This investment was over the top
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
its worth to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a strong addition into the defense.

On the other hand
, state always provides new policies to increase social benefits for the commoners.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
is launching new schemes for the workers like Employee State Insurances, Provident funds, Pensions, Subsidies and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to fulfill the essentials of food, shelter and bread. To exemplify, during Covid-19 pandemic,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
of all over the world manages to provide all the essential
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
like groceries and medicines as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as online banking and insurances were for great
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
. Each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
invests a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
amount on Covid-19 vaccine to ensure the well-being of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

To conclude
, from my book of knowledge,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
known about what is suitable for the country. Ministry of state using their wisdom to invest into such sectors where there is a scope to recover. In a nutshell,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is using their noodles at its best for the betterment of both.
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IELTS essay A government has a responsibility to its citizens to ensure their safety. Therefore, some people think that the government should increase spending on defense but spend less on social benefits.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
350 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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