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A cell phone is one of the important stuff that people carry with them in their daily lives.

A cell phone is one of the important stuff that people carry with them in their daily lives. A7Y1
A cell phone is one of the important stuff that people carry with them in their daily lives. Therefore, computer companies usually provide users with a kind variety of mobile applications. It has been significantly commented that most people are charged when they want to have any mobile apps. Although It could bring more advantages, I believe that paying for any apps would have some negative points. On one hand, purchasing mobile applications would have positive effects on businesses due to many reasons. First, engineer companies invest a huge amount of money in their engineering and professionals to release practical and useful applications. As a result, charging application users could be a financial way to support these businesses. Besides, paying for cellphone apps could be considered as a kind of credit to investment to show their interests and satisfaction regarding those products. So, buying a phone application would be more useful for companies. On the other hand, in my opinion, paying for using mobile applications does not get acceptable feedback for companies. In other words, as the chargeable application does not affordable for all people, it makes some users unable to support those products financially and maybe companies could not continue their business. For example, it is not affordable for most women to be charge around 20 $ per month if they want to benefit from a cooking mobile application. Consequently, this makes the cooking application no longer to be produced. In Conclusion, although some people do not find any problem when they become charged for using cell phone apps, I think that the negative consequence of this development could not be positive
A cell phone is one of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
stuff that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
carry with them in their daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
Therefore
, computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
usually
provide users with a kind variety of mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applications
. It has been
significantly
commented that most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are charged
when they want to have any mobile apps. Although It could bring more advantages, I believe that paying for any apps would have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
points.

On one hand, purchasing mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applications
would have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects on businesses due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons.
First
, engineer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
invest a huge amount of money in their engineering and professionals to release practical and useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applications
.
As a result
, charging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
application
users could be a financial way to support these businesses.
Besides
, paying for cellphone apps could
be considered
as a kind of credit to investment to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their interests and satisfaction regarding those products.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, buying a phone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
application
would be more useful for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.

On the other hand
, in my opinion, paying for using mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applications
does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
acceptable feedback for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
.
In other words
, as the chargeable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
application
does not affordable for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
users unable to support those products
financially
and maybe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
could not continue their business.
For example
, it is not affordable for most women to be charge around
The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: "$20".
20 $
per month if they want to benefit from a cooking mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
application
.
Consequently
, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the cooking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
application
no longer to
be produced
.

In Conclusion
, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not find any problem when they become charged for using cell phone apps, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequence of this development could not be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
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IELTS essay A cell phone is one of the important stuff that people carry with them in their daily lives.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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