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A big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree?

Many people believe that a big salary is a key encouragement for their professional life, whereas some individuals prefer o be satisfied with low income when it comes to their passion. Job satisfaction is an absolute imperative when it comes to productivity. This essay will argue why it is so. Some individual's passion to work is driven by money. Employees believe having a large sum of money will contribute to a more comfortable lifestyle, so they tend to work and achieve better. While some people work thinking that they will be able to buy material things with a large salary, therefore are keen to work more passionately. For example, a person can buy a luxurious car or clothes with money and it provides them satisfaction and fulfillment. Often people think that a larger paycheck is more crucial than work contentment, whereas if job satisfaction is not met the productivity of an individual may decrease. If they are not completely dedicated to their work it could lead to a decline in their task achievement and demotion. People driven by passion tend to achieve more, while individuals working for a large payment might have a mental breakdown due to the pressure and dissatisfaction from work. For example, one of my relatives used to work in a bank and receive a huge salary while not enjoying his work. Later, he had a mental breakdown therefore was unable to continue with his employment further. In conclusion, this essay argued why job satisfaction is more important than a large salary. Money can be a passion driving factor, but without job contentment productivity and creativity may decline; leading to unemployment and mental health issues.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
is a key encouragement for their professional life, whereas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals prefer
Did you mean “to”?
o
be satisfied
with low income when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passion
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is an absolute imperative when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to productivity. This essay will argue why it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
individual's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passion
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is driven
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. Employees believe having a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
sum of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
will contribute to a more comfortable lifestyle,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they tend to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and achieve better. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
thinking that they will be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
material things with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
,
therefore
are keen to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
more
passionately
.
For example
, a person can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a luxurious car or clothes with
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
money and
it provides them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
and fulfillment.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Often
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that a larger paycheck is more crucial than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
contentment, whereas if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is not met the productivity of an individual may decrease. If they are not completely dedicated to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
it could lead to a decline in their task achievement and demotion.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
driven by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passion
tend to achieve more, while individuals working for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
payment might have a mental breakdown due to the pressure and dissatisfaction from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
For example
, one of my relatives
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in a bank and receive a huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
while not enjoying his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. Later, he had a mental breakdown
therefore
was unable to continue with his employment
further
.
In conclusion
, this essay argued why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Money
can be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passion
driving factor,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
contentment productivity and creativity may decline; leading to unemployment and mental health issues.
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IELTS essay A big salary is much more important than job satisfaction.

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
278 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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