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UNIVERSITY/GOVERNMENT RESPONSE TO THE BATTLE CRY OF THE EDUCATION SECTOR “ACADEMIC BREAK”

Education is the most important thing in the world that individual should possesses. We, Filipino believe that education is the only way to be grateful in life and have a better future. Life is full of challenges and obstacles that we need to face and should never outrun but what if we are not only looking at our lives but also to others? And what if this pandemic will change the usual education we had? Are we ready? Are they ready? Is the government ready for the consequences? Question that bothers me the most is that, if the system of education changes what they will do? We all know not everyone of us are capable or even afford to be in school, what will be their actions? Year 2020 wasn’t the year for everyone, Covid-19 pandemic definitely visited the Philippines and the cases arise from different cities of Manila. This pandemic changes a lot of things in life of Filipino. Every one of us need to adjust; new laws and protocols was implemented. People are scared from what is happening to our country. This is now the “New Normal. ” Filipino starve because all companies need to shut down, stores are closed even malls and schools. Government started to tremble for the situation, they gave their best for all the Filipino, yet it was not enough because many lives were taken by this pandemic and gradually increasing as days went by. Due to these circumstances, Most of Filipino families are wondering what will happen to the education of their children. In this time of crisis, Department of Education and Commission on Higher Education proposed and suggested the Online Class and suddenly approved instead of having face to face interaction of the students. In line with this, it will not be too risky for every student in exposing themselves from the virus. This proposal was a big help for others and for some, it is not. New Normal was implemented in our Education system by means of online classes but some students and families are against with this kind of education because not all students have their own gadgets for the online classes. Pandemic came, work stopped and the education was still in session through online learning. Many issues arose and conflict was addressed; some are having problem regarding to the internet they have, don’t have money to buy load, no money for the Wi-Fi and the saddest part is that, they don’t have a gadget to start with the online class so others are forced to have modular type of education. Through this reality in life, students are started to voice out their opinions and trying to reach out to our government to have academic freeze or break. Many reasons for them to stop, but there also reason to continue for the online classes. Many are pushing for the education sector to skip this school year so no students will be left behind.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing in the world that individual should
The modal verb ‘should’ requires the verb’s base form.
possesses
. We, Filipino believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
way to be grateful in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and have a better future.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Life
is full of challenges and obstacles that we need to face and should never outrun
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
what if we are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
looking at our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to others? And what if this pandemic will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the usual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
we had? Are we ready? Are they ready? Is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
ready for the consequences? Question that bothers me the most is that, if the system of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
what they will do? We all know not
Did you mean “every one”?
everyone
of us are capable or even afford to be in school, what will be their actions? Year 2020 wasn’t the year for everyone, Covid-19 pandemic definitely visited the Philippines and the cases arise from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cities of Manila. This pandemic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
things in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of Filipino. Every one of us need to adjust; new laws and protocols
was implemented
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
are scared
from what is happening to our country. This is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
the “New Normal. ” Filipino starve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
need to shut down, stores
are closed
even malls and schools.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to tremble for the situation, they gave their best for all the Filipino,
yet
it was not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
were taken
by this pandemic and
gradually
increasing as days went by.

Due to these circumstances, Most of Filipino families are wondering what will happen to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
of their children. In this time of crisis, Department of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
and Commission on Higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
proposed and suggested the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Class
and
suddenly
approved
instead
of having face to face interaction of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. In line with this, it will not be too risky for every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
in exposing themselves from the virus. This proposal was a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
for others and for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
, it is not. New Normal
was implemented
in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
system by means of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and families are against with this kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
not all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
gadgets for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
. Pandemic came, work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
was
still
in session through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
learning.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
issues arose and conflict
was addressed
;
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
are having problem
The phrase ‘regarding to’ is not correct. Use “regarding” or “regard to”.
regarding to
the internet they have, don’t have money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
load, no money for the Wi-Fi and the saddest part is that, they don’t have a gadget to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
Use a comma before ‘so’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
class
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
others
are forced
to have modular type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. Through this reality in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to voice out their opinions and trying to reach out to our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to have academic freeze or break.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
reasons for them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there
also
reason to continue for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
are pushing for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
sector to skip this school
Use a comma before ‘so’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
year
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
behind.
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IELTS essay UNIVERSITY/GOVERNMENT RESPONSE TO THE BATTLE CRY OF THE EDUCATION SECTOR “ACADEMIC BREAK”

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
493 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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