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2. In recent years, television has contributed most to changing people’s quality of life. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

2. In recent years, television has contributed most to changing people’s quality of life. pk30
Nowadays, television is being as a vital role in our lives, it devoted the most meaningful in the part on daily. Some said that television was have making transformation life system. Personally, I absolutely agree with the television bring some merits of combination functional purpose in one and convey the latest stuff in 24 hours coverage. Furthermore, recent HD- LED television incessantly upgrade by advanced technology in newest period. Undeniable of the powerfulness, television have multipurpose function similar to the telephone now. Television is just a enlarge version of cell phone. For instances, in every smart TV has provide wireless connection to several apps such as Youtube, Google in the TV itself, however, it’s more convenience for every one use, compared to the past two decades, the people were not breakthrough developed technology of intend TV in such function, so in modern society, quality of humans being are rise gradually because cognitive stuff we get is much more than in the previous time. Moreover, television is not only bringing on various type of purpose, it presents as a crucial role in daily life. Although television is not frequently use, but it acts as tool for reinforce relationship between relatives in huge family. For example, family members were used the television connected to gaming app, PS5 latest version going to battle between the siblings or others, otherwise, in house mini theatres for every person involved to enjoy the horrible or comedic movie. To conclude, television has more contribution in modern social for preparing vast powerful function in one and consequences to rise up the quality of people’s standard living. In future, technology in television would be up-to date to have a new record in civilization to the our global.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
is being as a vital role in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, it devoted the most meaningful in the part on daily.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
said that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
was
Consider using a past participle here: "had".
have
making transformation life system.
Personally
, I
absolutely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
merits of combination functional purpose in one and convey the latest stuff in 24 hours coverage.

Furthermore
, recent HD- LED
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
incessantly
upgrade by advanced technology in
A determiner is probably missing here: "the newest".
newest
period. Undeniable of the
Possible spelling mistake found.
powerfulness
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
have multipurpose function similar to the telephone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Television
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
enlarge version of cell phone. For instances, in every smart TV has
Use past participle here: "provided".
provide
wireless connection to several apps such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
Youtube
, Google
The usual collocation for technology is "on," not "in." It is better to say this: "on the TV".
in the TV
itself,
however
, it’s more convenience for every one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
, compared to the past two decades, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
were not breakthrough developed technology of intend TV in such function,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
in modern society, quality of humans being are rise
gradually
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
cognitive stuff we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
is much more than in the previous time.

Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
bringing on various type of purpose, it presents as a crucial role in daily life. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
is not
frequently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it acts as tool for reinforce relationship between relatives in huge family.
For example
, family members were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
connected to gaming app, PS5
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
version going to battle between the siblings or others,
otherwise
, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
mini
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatres' is British English.
theatres
for every person involved to enjoy the horrible or comedic movie.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
has more contribution in modern social for preparing vast powerful function in one and
The usual preposition to use after "consequences" is not "to". Did you mean "consequences of", "consequences for", or "consequences on"?
consequences to
rise up the quality of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s standard living.
Did you mean: "In the future"?
In future
, technology in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
would be up-to date to have a new record in civilization to
A determiner cannot combine with a possessive pronoun. Did you mean simply "our global" or "the global"?
the our global
.
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IELTS essay 2. In recent years, television has contributed most to changing people’s quality of life.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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