Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

10. "When people succeed in life, it is because of hard work. Being lucky has nothing to do with success in life. " Do you agree or disagree with the quotation above? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your position. v.2

10. "When people succeed in life, it is because of hard work. Being lucky has nothing to do with success in life. " with the quotation above? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your position. v. 2
No one can deny that there are both positive and negative aspects of people who succed in life by their hard work or by luck. If i were forced to choose, i would definitely say that hard work is the basis of success. It is my firm belief for a number of reasons, and i will develop these ideas in the subsequent paragraphs. To begin with, hardwork is the engine for each of us. If we want to be rich, we need to work very hard to achieve our goals. I have to admit that my opinion on this matter, has been profoundly influenced by my own personal experience. You see, my friend was from poor family, but he wanted to be a millionaire before his twenty. So as he knew that there were 2 years untill his twenty, he started to work enormously hard. As a result after a year he opened his first firm which is a vehichle repair firm, and started his small business. Now it is a successful project, with two millions of dollars profit for a year. For this reason I think that hardworking is the most important thing in our life. Secondly, self education also an important thing i, which is also a part of hardworking. If you want to have a high salary or be smart, you need to learn a new thing every simple day. Drawing from my own experience, i wanted to be a good programmer. I took some classes but they didn' t make me a programmer. Then i started to study myself, by finding new materials for it. Moreover i texted my questions on the internet platforms, to get answers to them. Its certainly clear to see that if you want to be successful, you need to work very hard. To make a long story short, in light of above mentioned questions, i strongly belief that if a person works hard, he will be a good specialist or really a man with great ambitions.
No one can deny that there are both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
Possible spelling mistake found.
succed
in life by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or by luck. If
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
were forced
to choose,
Did you mean "I"?
i
would definitely say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is the basis of success. It is my firm belief for a number of reasons, and
Did you mean "I"?
i
will develop these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
in the subsequent paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
Possible spelling mistake found.
hardwork
is the engine for each of us. If we want to be rich, we need to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
to achieve our goals. I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
admit that my opinion on this matter, has been
profoundly
influenced by my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
personal experience. You
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, my friend was from poor family,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he wanted to be a millionaire
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
his twenty.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
as he knew that there were 2 years
Possible spelling mistake found.
untill
his twenty, he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
enormously
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
.
As a result
after a year he opened his
first
firm which is a
Possible spelling mistake found.
vehichle
repair firm, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
his
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
business.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
it is a successful project, with
Use a singular form of the numeral here: "two million".
two millions of
dollars profit for a year.
For this reason
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that hardworking is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing in our life.

Secondly
, self education
also
an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing i, which is
also
a part of hardworking. If you want to have a high salary or be smart, you need to learn a new thing every simple day. Drawing from my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experience,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
wanted to be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
programmer. I took
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
classes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
Possible spelling mistake found.
didn&
#039; t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
me a programmer. Then
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to study myself, by finding new materials for it.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
texted my questions on the internet platforms, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
answers to them. Its
certainly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that if you want to be successful, you need to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a long story short, in light of above mentioned questions, i
strongly
belief that if a person works
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
, he will be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
specialist or
really
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
with great ambitions.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
10Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Mistakes

IELTS essay 10. "When people succeed in life, it is because of hard work. Being lucky has nothing to do with success in life. " with the quotation above? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your position. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
335 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts