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Write about both pie charts together conparing each activity in turn

Write about both pie charts together conparing each activity in turn obl9b
The given pie charts provide information about changes in UK spending patterns from 1966 to 1996. Overall at the beginning of the period food made up biggest proportion, however, at the end of the time car users increased. In both years compurets and books took small fraction of graph. In 1966 cars were about one-forth of household spending, although it reached to approximately half. Over the following 30 years restaurants were doubled. Computers were mere 1% in 1966, yet it grew around 10% and it made one-tenth. From the figure we can see decreases in some sectors between 1966 to 1996Food made up biggest percentage (44%). Nevertheless it faced dramatically decline (14%). Also book readers were 7% it reduced around 5%. Between 1966 to 1996 furniture and pertol saw a minimal drop mere 1%.
The
given
pie charts provide information about
changes
in UK spending patterns from 1966 to 1996.
Overall
at the beginning of the period food made up biggest proportion,
however
, at the
end
of the time car users increased. In both years
compurets
and books took
small
fraction of graph. In 1966 cars were about one-forth of household spending, although it reached to approximately half. Over the following 30 years restaurants
were doubled
. Computers were mere 1% in 1966,
yet
it grew around 10% and it made one-tenth. From the figure we can
see
decreases in
some
sectors between 1966 to 1996Food made up biggest percentage (44%).
Nevertheless
it faced
dramatically
decline (14%).
Also
book readers were 7% it
reduced
around 5%.
Between 1966 to 1996
furniture and
pertol
saw
a minimal drop mere 1%.
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IELTS academic Write about both pie charts together conparing each activity in turn

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
134 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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