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Which is more important in your opinion? Family or friends?

Which is more important in your opinion? Family or friends? lqoyD
We are indeed among plethora of people every day. However, sometimes we have to choose which ones are more important for us, family or friends? In my point of view, they have their own values in our life in some aspects. And in this essay, those aspects are going to be illustrated. First of all, family is our core of love. They support us in various points in our life, for example when we learn how to walk, how to talk and how to express our ideas. Sometimes, we can say that our family is the real motivation to take off. However, there some points when we are likely to avoid to discuss some issues with family members, like problems in relationship with boyfriend or girlfriend or some troubles in interaction with family members. As we have many in common with our peers, it is much easier to talk about these issues. To conclude, according to the reasons above, we had better balance the importance of both family members and friends since they have their valuable position in life.
We are
indeed
among plethora of
people
every day.
However
,
sometimes
we
have to
choose which ones are more
important
for us,
family
or friends? In my point of view, they have their
own
values in our life in
some
aspects. And in this essay, those aspects are going to
be illustrated
.
First of all
,
family
is our core of
love
. They support us in various points in our life,
for example
when we learn how to walk, how to talk and how to express our
ideas
.
Sometimes
, we can say that our
family
is the real motivation to take off.
However
, there
some
points when we are likely to
avoid to discuss
some
issues with
family
members, like problems in relationship with boyfriend or girlfriend or
some
troubles in interaction with
family
members. As we have
many
in common with our peers, it is much easier to talk about these issues.
To conclude
, according to the reasons above, we had better balance the importance of both
family
members and friends since they have their valuable position in life.
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IELTS academic Which is more important in your opinion? Family or friends?

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
179 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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