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Water consumption of 2 countries

Water consumption of 2 countries 3bW3X
The line graph illustrates global water usage in various sector fields by world. Whereas, the table depicts water used by Brazil and Congo in the year 2000. In 1990 to 1930s water consumed at constant pace of 5000km². From 1940s it gradually increased upto 3000km² which was highest among the two. Whilst industrial area and domestic use of water was about to negligible constant till 1940. Since from 1950 to 2000, there was slightly inclined in both these areas about 9000km² and 3000km² respectively. In contrast, Brazil had the highest population of 176 millions which used land for cultivation was about 26, 500km² whilst the people in Congo was 5. 2 millions. However, land covered for irrigation it was about 100km². There was huge gap between the water consumption of 350m²Overall, most of the water used by the agricultural sector by Brazil in 2000
The line graph illustrates global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
usage in various sector fields by world. Whereas, the table depicts
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by Brazil and Congo in the year 2000. In 1990 to 1930s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
consumed at constant pace of
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "5000 km"
5000km
². From 1940s it
gradually
increased
Possible spelling mistake found.
upto
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "3000 km"
3000km
² which was highest among the two. Whilst industrial area and domestic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
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water
was about to negligible constant till 1940. Since from 1950 to 2000, there was
slightly
inclined in both these areas about
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "9000 km"
9000km
² and
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "3000 km"
3000km
²
respectively
.
In contrast
, Brazil had the highest population of 176 millions which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
land for cultivation was about 26,
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "500 km"
500km
² whilst the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in Congo was 5. 2 millions.
However
, land covered for irrigation it was about
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "100 km"
100km
². There was huge gap between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
consumption of
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "350 m"
350m
²
Overall
, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by the agricultural sector by Brazil in 2000
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IELTS academic Water consumption of 2 countries

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
143 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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