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visitors to three areas in european

visitors to three areas in european LLRxp
The chart below shows the number of people who paid a visit to European areas from 1987 to 2007, in five-year intervals. Overall, the number of visitors who went to all 3 given places increased significantly during the period. In 1987, nearly 40 thousand people visited the coast. In the next 5 years, the coast’s figure dropped slightly to about 35 thousand before having a substantial improvement. The number of people who went to the coast reached the peak at approximately 75 thousand in 2007. On the other hand, the lake’s figure had a significant rise during the time from 1987 to 2007, at 10 to 50 thousand respectively. It reached the peak at 75 thousand by the year 2002. In contrast, visitors rarely go to the mountain, it can be easily seen at the mountain’s figure. Its figure started at 20 thousand in 1987. In 1994, there was an decline in the number of people who travelled to the mountains,
The chart below
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the
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number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
paid a visit to European areas from 1987 to 2007, in five-year intervals.
Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of visitors
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
went to all 3
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
places increased
significantly
during the period.

In 1987,
nearly
40 thousand
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people
visited the coast. In the
next
5 years, the coast’s
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figure
dropped
slightly
to about 35 thousand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
having a substantial improvement. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
went to the coast reached the peak at approximately 75 thousand in 2007.
On the other hand
, the lake’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
had a significant rise during the time from 1987 to 2007, at 10 to 50 thousand
respectively
. It reached the peak at 75 thousand by the year 2002.

In contrast
, visitors rarely go to the mountain, it can be
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
at the mountain’s
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figure
. Its
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figure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
at 20 thousand in 1987. In 1994, there was
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
decline in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
travelled to the mountains,

IELTS academic visitors to three areas in european

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
161 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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