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the chart below provides information about student accommodation at one US city in 2013

the chart below provides information about student accommodation at one US city in 2013 eE0mV
The following bar chart illustrates accommodation of students in a city from the US. Overall, it can be seen that most undergraduate students tend to lived in dormitories, shared houses or apartments. Meanwhile, graduate students mostly lived in shared houses, apartments and some even have owned properties or married and owned a house Firstly, two main accommodations that undergraduate students lived in is university dormitories and shared houses, some chose apartments or with their parents. Only a few number of students owned properties like house or a flat and the number of them married and housing are even fewer. On the other hand, a considerable number of graduate students have owned a house or a apartment, the rest of them mostly stayed in shared house, apartments and even a large number of them are married and housing. Another noticeable point is that almost none of them lived in dormitories or with their parents For comparision, living in dormitories or with families are 2 points that we can easily compare. While, most undergraduate students lived in those accommodations, almost no graduate students did the same thing. Meanwhile, graduate students tend to lived in shared accommodations or even owned properties more than undergraduate students.
The following bar chart illustrates
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accommodation
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in a city from the US.
Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that most
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undergraduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
tend to
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lived
in
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dormitories
,
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shared
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartments
. Meanwhile,
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graduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
mostly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lived
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
,
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apartments
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
even have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owned
properties or married and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owned
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house


Firstly
, two main accommodations that
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undergraduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lived
in is university
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dormitories
and
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shared
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
chose
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apartments
or with their parents.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only
a few
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number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owned
properties like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
or a flat and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of them married and housing are even fewer.
On the other hand
, a considerable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owned
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
or
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
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apartment
, the rest of them
mostly
stayed in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
,
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apartments
and even a large
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number
of them
are married
and housing. Another noticeable point is that almost none of them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lived
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitories
or with their
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
parents


For
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comparision
, living in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitories
or with families are 2 points that we can
easily
compare. While, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
undergraduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lived
in those accommodations, almost no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
did the same thing. Meanwhile,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
tend to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lived
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shared
accommodations or even
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owned
properties more than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
undergraduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.

IELTS academic the chart below provides information about student accommodation at one US city in 2013

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
202 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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