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Visiting a river site is one of my most favourite things to do during the summertime, and if I am visiting a calm river, as opposed to the “vi

Visiting a river site is one of my most favourite things to do during the summertime, and if I am visiting a calm river, as opposed to the “vi E7Jw3
The chart illustrates the total minutes of phone calls in England, which are divided into three distinct that are local calls, national and international, and smartphone calls during 1995 to 2002. Overall, it can be observed that the proportion of local calls are much higher as compared to others, while the mobile calls accounted for the lowest figure which can be seen over the period given. In terms of local fixed calls, head by far the greatest ratio in every spend 70 billion minutes in 1995 which grows up to 90 Billion in 1999 afterward figure plummeted and reached around 70 billion in 2002. Analysis of national and Overseas car was average in the UK, English people work consumed nearly 39 million minutes in the initial year, that's slightly surged every Breadth in approximately 59 billion in 2002. Moreover, the striking feature of mobile calls was that it started from at approximately 2 billion in first year, including mobile phone calls become useful in 2002 and public spend no more oldest 15 million minutes talking in on it
The chart illustrates the total minutes of phone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
in England, which
are divided
into three distinct that are local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
, national and international, and smartphone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
during 1995 to 2002.

Overall
, it can
be observed
that the proportion of local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
are much higher
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
as
compared to others, while the mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
accounted for the lowest figure which can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
over the period
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
.

In terms of local
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
, head by far the greatest ratio in every spend 70
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
minutes in 1995 which grows up to 90
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Billion
in 1999 afterward figure plummeted and reached around 70
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in 2002. Analysis of national and Overseas car was average in the UK, English
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
work consumed
nearly
39 million minutes in the initial year, that's
slightly
surged every Breadth in approximately 59
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in 2002.

Moreover
, the striking feature of mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
was that it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
from at approximately 2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in
first
year, including mobile phone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
become useful in 2002 and public spend no
Use only "oldest" (without 'more') when you use the superlative.
more oldest
15 million minutes talking in on it
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IELTS academic Visiting a river site is one of my most favourite things to do during the summertime, and if I am visiting a calm river, as opposed to the “vi

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
177 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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