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University students must pay all tuition fees, because it benefits mostly them individually, rather than the society as a whole. Do you agree or disagree?

The academic charges paid by the students studying at the university will be vital for their better education not for other people in the community. This essay agrees that the money collected can be used for facility development in the institute and capacity building of the faculty. The facilities in the university can be improved by the fund collected from the students. That is to say that, in third-level education institutions, every person enrolled should pay some amount of fee for procuring and improving laboratory equipment, comfortable study tables and chairs and other required technology such as projector, computers and laptop which eventually helps in the betterment of the student's education. For instance, every year the Royal University of Bhutan collects a sum of Rs. 900000/- as tuition fee from the students and later use that money for improvements and maintenance of classroom furniture and other equipment use by the students. Furthermore, the budget collected would be used for faculty’s training and education since it is essential for the university to have qualified and well-trained teachers. Thus, well-educated tutors in the tertiary education institute would finally be benefited the students studying in the university which results in graduates getting a rewarding career in the future. For example, Barathair University in Tamil Nadu, India allocates a certain amount of budget from the fees collected to send faculty abroad for the training in a relevant subject. The students with good knowledge of education from the university would later benefit community development by graduates participating in discourse and debate, however, the primary beneficiaries of their money would be a student themselves. ----------------------- In conclusion, although the society been benefited by the talented and brilliant students produced by the university, the money collected as tuition fee would significantly benefit the students studying in the institute.
The academic charges paid by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
studying at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
will be vital for their better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
not for other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the community. This essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
collected can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for facility development in the institute and capacity building of the faculty.

The facilities in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
by the fund collected from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
That is
to say that, in third-level
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
institutions, every person enrolled should pay
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
for procuring and improving laboratory equipment, comfortable study tables and chairs and other required technology such as projector, computers and laptop which
eventually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in the betterment of the student's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
For instance
, every year the Royal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
of Bhutan collects a sum of Rs. 900000/- as tuition
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and later
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for improvements and maintenance of classroom furniture and other equipment
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
by the students.

Furthermore
, the budget collected would be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for faculty’s training and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
since it is essential for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
to have qualified and well-trained teachers.
Thus
, well-educated tutors in the tertiary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
institute would
finally
be benefited
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
studying in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
which results in graduates getting a rewarding career in the future.
For example
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Barathair
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
in Tamil Nadu, India allocates a certain amount of budget from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
collected to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
faculty abroad for the training in a relevant subject. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
knowledge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
would later benefit community development by graduates participating in discourse and debate,
however
, the primary beneficiaries of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
would be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
themselves.

-----------------------

In conclusion
, although the society
been benefited
by the talented and brilliant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
produced by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
collected as tuition
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
would
significantly
benefit the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
studying in the institute.
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IELTS academic University students must pay all tuition fees, because it benefits mostly them individually, rather than the society as a whole.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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