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Three pie charts show the proportions of Korean video games in terms of gender, age, and best-selling games in 2003. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Three pie charts show the proportions of Korean video games in terms of gender, age, and best-selling games in 2003. al1Rm
The given data illustrate the percentage of Korean video games with respect to the age of players, gender and best selling electronic games in 2003 in the form of pie charts. It is clear that the people belonging to the age group 18-35 are most involved in playing video games. Approximately, three-fourths of the females are found to be game lovers. Among all the games, action games are the most popular ones. Firstly, looking at the age of the players, 23% of the players are over 35 years of age whereas the maximum users account for 42% belong to the age group of 18-35. The other 35% of the video gamers are below 18 years of age. Secondly, men are observed to be the least active game players resulting in 28% only. Lastly, among the best selling electronic games, 42% of the players buy action games. The second most popular game (21%) is sports. The rest of the players are interested in buying role-play, educational as well as racing games. A few populations (6%) of gamers also buy some other electronic games.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
data illustrate the percentage of Korean video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
with respect to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of
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players
, gender and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
best selling
electronic
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games
in 2003 in the form of pie charts.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
belonging to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
group 18-35 are most involved in playing video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. Approximately, three-fourths of the females
are found
to be game lovers. Among all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
, action
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
are the most popular ones.

Firstly
, looking at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
, 23% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
are over 35 years of
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age
whereas the maximum users account for 42% belong to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
group of 18-35. The other 35% of the video gamers are below 18 years of
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age
.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
are observed
to be the least active game
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players
resulting in 28%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
.

Lastly
, among the
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
best selling
electronic
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games
, 42% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
action
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. The second most popular game (21%) is sports. The rest of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
are interested
in buying role-play, educational
as well
as racing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. A few populations (6%) of gamers
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
.
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IELTS academic Three pie charts show the proportions of Korean video games in terms of gender, age, and best-selling games in 2003.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
182 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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