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three major factors that explain the rise in popularity of social networking services.

three major factors that explain the rise in popularity of social networking services. 2RmYx
There are three major factors that explain the rise in popularity of social networking services. First, most of the websites are free to use which make them available and easy to approach for everyone. Users are more likely to prefer a chargeless service where they can spend time without being bothered. Particularly, these services make profit mainly from advertisements instead of their clients. Second, social networking sites fulfill the need to associate with individuals. People see these as a great opportunity not only to connect with friends but also get to know others from all over the world. For instance, Facebook offers users the ability to take part in different parties that match up with their interests. A person can look up information about others with a single tap, or they can effortlessly communicate with friends through a video call. Last but not least, the increase in social websites allows businesses to reach out further into a wider range of potential customers. To be more specific, companies take advantage of the media to look for promising targets by investing their personal information. More people using networking websites, more customer data to analyse. Overall, social networking sites are growing in popularity due to those above reasons.
There are three major factors that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
the rise in popularity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking services.
First
, most of the websites are free to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them available and easy to approach for everyone. Users are more likely to prefer a
Possible spelling mistake found.
chargeless
service where they can spend time without
being bothered
.
Particularly
, these services
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
profit
mainly
from advertisements
instead
of their clients. Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking sites fulfill the need to associate with individuals.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
these as a great opportunity not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to connect with friends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know others from all over the world.
For instance
, Facebook offers users the ability to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
parties that match up with their interests. A person can look up information about others with a single tap, or they can
effortlessly
communicate with friends through a video call. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, the increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
websites
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
businesses to reach out
further
into a wider range of potential customers. To be more specific,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
take advantage of the media to look for promising targets by investing their personal information. More
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
using networking websites, more customer data to
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
.
Overall
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking sites are growing in popularity due to those above reasons.

IELTS academic three major factors that explain the rise in popularity of social networking services.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
205 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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